


It's A Chat World's Craziness

by Florafionpetals, Leafpool101, PokemonKatt, PokemonMasterette



Series: Chat Fics [2]
Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: A lot of FtM, Ash and Masterette are insane and keep causing havoc, Chatting & Messaging, Co-Written, Crazy, Drinking, F/F, M/M, Multi, Original Character(s), Other, Pokemon, PokemonKatt/PokemonMasterette/Florafionpetals/Leafpool101 Collab, Post Mpreg, Randomness, Swearing, Trans Leon, Trans Piers, Trans Sycamore, Trans Tobias, Trans Trevor, Trans bede
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:01:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 55
Words: 17,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23801998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Florafionpetals/pseuds/Florafionpetals, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leafpool101/pseuds/Leafpool101, https://archiveofourown.org/users/PokemonKatt/pseuds/PokemonKatt, https://archiveofourown.org/users/PokemonMasterette/pseuds/PokemonMasterette
Summary: The chats shall come together as one. - Alternative title: Some peeps writing on the same page all at once. XDProtagTime: What have you guys done?!FloraNFauna: WELCOME TO FOOLS 2.0!WorldChamp38: We da bosses, now stfu.KingOfTheKeys: I wanna fuckin' yeet myself out the window.bluehair-dontcare: Don't we all?DoctorOrders: I need my own doctor...ChatBrotherLance: I regret breathing.Jirachi: What's the answer to question 487?ChaoticGay: E E E E E E E E E E EThirstyGay: Huzzah! Another gay!Sticks&Stone: If you can set a chat's sexuality, this one would be hella gay.
Relationships: Citron | Clemont/Satoshi | Ash Ketchum/Shouta | Sawyer, Dande | Leon/Kibana | Raihan, Fleur-de-lis | Lysandre/Lyer | Lear, Giima | Grimsley/Hachiku | Brycen, Haiberu | Bella/Sutera | Stella, Ishi | Ben/Ocesu | Ace, Kabu/Yanagi | Pryce, Kyou | Koga/Senri | Norman, Makuwa | Gordie/Nezu | Piers, Mikuri | Wallace/Shirona | Cynthia/Tsuwabuki Daigo | Steven Stone/Wataru | Lance, Millefeui | Miette/Nene | Nini
Series: Chat Fics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1735663
Comments: 172
Kudos: 59





	1. CHARACTER INTRODUCTIONS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, look at all of these lovely people!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If any chapters have more than one author, blame Katt for the grammar patrol. UwU

ENTIRE CHARACTER LIST:

WorldChamp38 – Katt (Author)

Jirachi - Masterette (Author)

FloraNFauna - Flora (Author)

ChaoticGay - Leaf (Author)

MegaSweetheart – Augustine/Prof. Sycamore

PapaKukui – Prof. Kukui

MamaKukui – Prof. Burnet

BlossomBoi – Triston/Prof. Blossom (OC)

ThePokemonProfessor – Sam/Prof. Oak

ScientificPeach - Sonia

ProtagTime - Ash

ChatBrotherLance - Lance

Sticks&Stone - Steven

ItsFabulousBish - Wallace

TheSinnohQueen - Cynthia

AdowableDwagon - Iris

LostBoi - Leon

Snekki - Koga

UnlimitedPower - Will

BurnMeAlive - Flint

CasinoCentral - Grimsley

ArtisticChefBoi - Siebold

StabbyStabby - Wikstrom

Doc. B - Brock

Misty404 - Misty

ElectricArmy – Lt. Surge

ColdAsIce - Pryce

DragonQueen - Clair

GurlOnFire - Flannery

JustANormalGuy - Norman

Bowtieman - Cilan

FilmMePlz - Brycen

ScienceDude - Clemont

ChoccyMilk - Milo

LochNessaMonster - Nessa

UltimateDad - Kabu

Bea193 - Bea

LilPureBoi - Allister

QuestionablyQuestionable - Opal

SassyLostChild - Bede

LoverBoulder - Gordie

ChatMumMelony - Melony

MarriedGoth - Piers

AdorableMorpeko960 - Marnie

RainDragon - Raihan

RocketMan1996 - Giovanni

FlareBoss - Lysandre

PrinceLife - Lear

ImSmort - Rose

I<3Garbage - Oleana

RibbonPrincess - May

WeedBrownie - Zinnia

ContestContender - Dawn

Legend4Life - Tobias

Enkidu - N

_truekalosqueen_ - Serena

smolbean.but.mean - Bonnie

IBeASadBean - Alain

15YearsWasted - Mairin

bluehair-dontcare - Miette

nini_is_trying - Nini

KingOfTheKeys – Monsieur Pierre

ThirstyGay - Shauna

TotallyNOTTierno - Tierno

CheetoPuff - Trevor

SoftBoyUwU - Sawyer

DoctorOrders – Ben/Doctor Sycamore (OC)

TechnicalHeart – Bella (OC)

ArtsyMulti – Stella (OC)

SpeedyBoi – Ace (OC)

HoleIn1 – Tanya (OC)

CampusGrill – Lisa (OC)

Antibeast - Gladion

NormalGirl4 - Lillie

Total Usernames: 72 (Oh wow)

New chapters coming soon.


	2. The Start Of Madness. Again.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh shit. It's this again. What the hell are 72 people up to?

**WorldChamp38 created a new group chat: Hell Rave.**

**WorldChamp38 added FloraNFauna, Jirachi, ChaoticGay and 68 others to the chat.**

**FloraNFauna, Jirachi and ChaoticGay are now moderators.**

PrinceLife: Not this shit again.

DragonQueen: WHY WORLD, WHY?!

FloraNFauna: Everyone get comfortable. You'll be here for a while.

RainDragon: Who's idea was this?!

ThePokemonProfessor: **Whoever it is will get a taste of my axe.**

PapaKukui: I'm scared already.

WorldChamp38: You haven't got an axe.

ThePokemonProfessor: It's inflatable! Won it at a charity fair.

ArtsyMulti: Oh jeez. Not this shit again.

PrinceLife: THAT'S MY LINE!

LilPureBoi: Can I get a warning next time before coming to another cursed chat???

UltimateDad: Ours isn't cursed.

ChatMumMelony: Kabu, dear, what's with the username change?

UltimateDad: Don't call me dear.

ChatMumMelony: Aww, why?

ColdAsIce: **Lay a single finger on him and I'll flood you with a sheer cold and shatter your corpse.**

Jirachi: Oh wow, it's not even been five minutes and we've had two death threats. _Brilliant._

UltimateDad: Hey you two, calm down will you? Melony, seriously, don't call me dear, we're over that. Pryce, you'll be the only one laying fingers on me. ;)

ColdAsIce: OwO

Jirachi: And there goes the sexually gay shit. Wahoo, goals reached.

ChaoticGay: Nah, we still gotta get them drunk, high, killed and arrested.

RocketMan1996: Not the last two, plz.

ChaoticGay: Ok, why are YOU of all people the one to deny me?

RocketMan1996: I just want to be wholesome here. :)

FlareBoss: Let Gio be wholesome.

ElectricArmy: I want to be wholesome too...

ChatBrotherLance: Nooo, I'm the wholesome one here. I'm just a soft boi, but strong too.

DragonQueen: You cried at the end of Frozen, Wreck It Ralph 2 and Toy Story 3.

ChatBrotherLance: THEY WERE SAD, OK?!

WorldChamp38: Ok, I didn't cry at Toy Story 3 or Frozen, but Wreck It Ralph 2 hit me so hard.

MegaSweetheart: Oh shit, even Katt cries.

WorldChamp38: I have feelings as well. I'm not a robot.

Jirachi: _Or are you?_

WorldChamp38: Shut up.

IBeASadBean: **What the fuck is wrong with you people?**

15YearsWasted: Wtf is with your username?

IBeASadBean: It's complicated.

WorldChamp38: It really isn't. You can have different usernames in certain group chats if you are given a permission invite, but when you get added unexpectedly, your default username is used automatically.

RainDragon: So that's why Leon's is LostBoi and not DandelionDragon?

LostBoi: Yeah, sorry Rai. :(

RainDragon: It's fine. It suits you too well.

SassyLostChild: Where my trans bitches at?!

MegaSweetheart: _**I am right here.**_

Legend4Life: IT'S A ME! YA LOCAL BAD BITCH! **WOOO!**

BurnMeAlive: What. The fuck. Just happened?

UnlimitedPower: _I don't even know half these people!_

ImSmort: Bede, don't call your pals bitches. Unless they want you to, then go ahead.

I<3Garbage: Mr Rose, wtf is with your username?

ImSmort: I'm a bitch. I'm a boss. I'm a bitch, I'm a boss and I shine like gloss.

I<3Garbage: _You quoted a fucking TikTok._

ImSmort: It's not just a TikTok, I love the song! Oh, and Lear, how's your daughter?

PrinceLife: Leah's just a sweet bundly of joy!

KingOfTheKeys: Wait until her teenage years.

FlareBoss: Shut it, panini stick.

KingOfTheKeys: We're not doing the panini shit over here.

LochNessaMonster: _**HAAAAAAAAA.**_

ScientificPeach: You ok there, Nessa?

LochNessaMonster: It's hilarious! You're tall and skinny like a panini.

KingOfTheKeys: I have a thicc ass, thank you very much. -_-

_truekalosqueen_: The performers know first hand. We were in the waiting room and Pierre comes in without his jacket on. He's looking for it and he actually left it in one of the boxes since his dressing room was getting deep cleaned. He just bends over and we get the spectacle. For our lesbian asses, we really didn't care.

KingOfTheKeys: >/////<

ThirstyGay: Tbf, I definitely see the appeal. You're pansexual, right?

KingOfTheKeys: Oui.

ThirstyGay: Basically, your ass is like a people beacon.

KingOfTheKeys: Cheers Shauna. _Very helpful._

Jirachi: Sarcasm.

KingOfTheKeys: O.O

Jirachi: HAHA, gotcha.

ChaoticGay: SHAUNA, WE THE GAY DUO.

ThirstyGay: Oh wow, we really are!

WorldChamp38: So we have the gay duo and the boi squad. The bois, say aye.

ArtisticChefBoi: Aye.

LostBoi: Aye.

BlossomBoi: Aye.

SpeedyBoi: Aye.

ProtagTime: The band is together.

ArtisticChefBoi: I don't have the time to make a band, I'm as busy as a motorway during rush hour.

WorldChamp38: Well that's one way to put it.

FloraNFauna: I already sense this is going to go very, _very, **very badly.**_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First proper chapter done! What do you all think?


	3. The craziness that is our life.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WTF happened here?

ProtagTime: I feel like stabbing myself

TheSinnohQueen: WTF did you do THIS time?!

ProtagTime: Entered this chat, duh. 

Misty404: It's your own fault, idiot. 

FlareBoss: Damn, Ketchup. she got U there!

ProtagTime: FOR THE THRITETH TIME, NOT MY NAME!!!

StabbyStabby: Sheesh. 

Jirachi: You're telling me. 

WorldChamp38: You said it.

CheetoPuff: There go any chance of this day being wholesome

KingOfTheKeys: Uh...Ash...we have a problem.

ProtagTime: And what's that. 

KingOfTheKeys: I'm..well...Prego, as you know already.

ThirstyGay: OOOOH....Who was it with? 

TotallyNOTTeirno: Tell us!

KingOfTheKeys: Well, with my husband Francis and we had a daughter, but apparently I ended up getting knocked up when I was drunk with Ash. 

Smolbean.but.mean: WTF!?! 

_truekalosqueen_ : Oof. Wouldn't wanna be U!

CheetoPuff: Knew it wasn't gonna be wholesome..it's the opposite.

ThristyGay: Me likey! 

Jirachi: Congrats...I guess? 

DoctorOrders: I can help with the birth! 

bluehair-dontcare: No shit. Not like it's in the username or anything. 

15YearsWasted: OwO 

IBeASadBean Wut's YOUR problem? 

15YearsWasted: Nothing.... just a little...uh...shell shocked. That's all

ProtagTime: I didn't sign up for this! 

Sticks&Stone: I'm gonna take a hike...far, far, away from this Gay wasteland. 

ThirstyGay: Why thank you! UwU

KingOfTheKeys: Now this is a party!

Smolbean.but.mean: If you say so....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I gave it a shot, hope it isn't too bad.


	4. Someone help these chaotic gays

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> emotional breakdown time guys, gals, and non binary pals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! It's Leaf here! So it's been my turn to write this chapter for a while, but as you may or may not know I am practically the CEO of procrastinating. I just want to apologize to my other wonderful co-creators for lacking on my part! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and that's it from me!
> 
> (also idk how pokemon timezones work so i just made it up pls correct me in the comments if pokemon has canon timezones okay bye)

ScienceDude: Sawyer’s laughing hysterically next to me right now.

ScienceDude: It’s 2am, I just wanna sleep...

AdowableDwagon: Haha

AdowableDwagon: Take the L.

Bowtieman: Iris, go to sleep.

AdowableDwagon: _Make me._

ThirstyGay: As soon as I get notifications from this chat, I come running.

ThirstyGay: What’s the tea?

ScienceDude: There is no tea.

ThirstyGay: _Doubt._

Sticks&Stone: Sawyer, what’s so funny?

SoftBoyUwU: Okay it’s literally not that funny.

SoftBoyUwU: But _Squidward._

Legend4Life: What?

WeedBrownie: Nice.

ImSmort: I don’t mean to be “that guy”, but how is that funny?

SoftBoyUwU: It’s not.

SoftBoyUwU: I’m going through the 4 stages of an emotional breakdown, gimme a break.

SoftBoyUwU: Ha, get it?

SoftBoyUwU: “Breakdown” and “break”.

SoftBoyUwU: Ha.

UltimateDad: Someone help this poor child…

RibbonPrincess: Just so we’re on the same page here, Sawyer...

RibbonPrincess: What are the 4 stages of an emotional breakdown??

SoftBoyUwU: Okay so...

ScienceDude: Oh no…

SoftBoyUwU: Stage 1- Denial.

SoftBoyUwU: Stage 2- Realization & Crying.

SoftBoyUwU: Stage 3- Literally everything is funny.

SoftBoyUwU: Stage 4- Acceptance & Moving on uwu.

PrinceLife: Wow.

SassyLostChild: Pretty sure that’s not how that works but go off I guess.

TotallyNOTTierno: He’s going through the 4 stages of an emotional breakdown give him a break.

SoftBoyUwU: Thank you Tierno.

ScienceDude: Please no one in this chat take medical advice from my boyfriend, he has lost his mind due to recent events.

SoftBoyUwU: Can confirm.

SoftBoyUwU: That is true.

CheetoPuff: Why are you all awake at 2am anyway?

RibbonPrincess: It’s not 2am everywhere!

LilPureBoi: Sorry I’m late to this chat, but it’s around 2 in the afternoon here in Galar!

AdowableDwagon: It’s like 12am in Unova.

ScienceDude: So the more important question is...

ScienceDude: Why are you awake at 2am Trevor?

CheetoPuff: Uhhhhh...

ThirstyGay: #exposed

ContestContender: Clemont and Sawyer, I’m guessing Ash isn’t with you guys right now?

ScienceDude: No.

SoftBoyUwU: No.

ThirstyGay: _I wonder why._

ChaoticGay: Tea

WorldChamp38: Tea

Jirachi: Tea

FloraNFauna: Tea

TotallyNOTTierno: Tea

AdowableDwagon: Tea

SassyLostChild: Tea

Bea193: STOP SPAMMING TEA!!

ChaoticGay: _Make us._

Misty404: I hate it here.

ProtagTime: Same.

Misty404: Ew, go away.

ProtagTime: I was literally agreeing with you.

Misty404: All in favor of taking away Ash’s chat room rights say “I”.

AdowableDwagon: I

RibbonPrincess: I

ContestContender: I

ThirstyGay: I

Misty404: Good enough for me.

ProtagTime: _Wow._

__

__

WorldChamp38: I love our chaotic gay chat :)

__


	5. 2am Cursed Material

MarriedGoth: …. You fuckers are awake at devil hour. I am legit concerned. 

ChatMumMelony: LANGUAGE!

MarriedGoth: Aye.. 

LoverBoulder: Oof mum you're here too? Damn I forgot. 

ChatMumMelony: :) 

AdowableDwagon: Umm.. Mum are you still doing the swear detector thing? If you are.. Don't scroll up ^^” so much vulgar

ChatMumMelony: Oh.. That's Sycamore's problem dearie. Those are his flock ^.^ I have mine~

LoverBoulder: Omfa

LilPureBoi: Why are you up so late Mister Gordie? 

LoverBoulder: …. Movie marathon? 

AdowableDwagon: You hesitated!

MarriedGoth: Relax Iris. We're watchin' Sausage Party. Marnie thinks I need to eat more for the wedding so here I am exposin' myself to food porn and draggin' my fiance down with me.

AdowableDwagon: Oooooh!

FloraNFauna: Umm htf does that make you hungry? If anything it just.. Nvm.

SassyLostChild: Isn't that movie a bit juvenile? 

AdorableMorpeko960: SHUT 

SassyLostChild: I take it back ^^" 

AdorableMorpeko960: :) 

MarriedGoth: …. You call this movie juvenile? Arceus Bede you have no idea. And Marnie, go to sleep. 

AdorableMorpeko960: Ok

LoverBoulder: Seriously. This movie ain't as innocent as it looks o-o 

15YearsWasted: Sausage party? Hey I was gonna watch that don't spoil! 

ChaoticGay: Cursed

MarriedGoth: DON'T WATCH IT IT'LL GIVE YOU NIGHTMARES

15YearsWasted: It can't be that bad! :O 

Jirachi: It is omg

LilPureBoi: What's food porn? 

ChaoticGay: *cough* 

AdowableDwagon: Uhhhh

DragonQueen: Bea's gonna kill whoever tells him. Boys you already know. 

MarriedGoth: *bloody flashbacks* 

LoverBoulder: OH MY ARCEUS GO TO BED KIDS

MarriedGoth: @IBeASadBean Hey is this your gremlin? Please come pick her up, I repeat, pick her up. She's about to subject herself to cursed material. 

IBeASadBean: Mairin go to sleep it's 2am -_- 

15YearsWasted: But Alain!

FloraNFauna: Listen to your elders heheheh

15YearsWasted: Ughh fine. But I'm still watching it one day - Ooh maybe Ash will join me!

IBeASadBean: Don't

IBeASadBean: ...I've seen it. Regretted it. It's not worth your time. Trust me. 

15YearsWasted: Hm sounds like a bad movie hearing it from you.. Right Imma watch something else then. After bed. Gnight!

SassyLostChild: Oma this is not a kid's movie. Now I'll never see a hotdog the same way again.

MarriedGoth: You've been warned. 

ProtagTime: I has been summoned?

LoverBoulder: I just said

MarriedGoth: Go to sleep Ash

ProtagTime: aw


	6. Confrontation, now GO TO SLEEP!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stuff happens. A lot of stuff happens.

ImSmort: HELP! _HELP! **PLEASE!**_

MegaSweetheart: What. The fuck. DO YOU WANT. _AT 4AM?!?!_

ImSmort: I'm being forced to watch food porn.

WorldChamp38: Don't. It's a trap.

IBeASadBean: Mairin's been frolicking with the Galarian twinks. It's been four hours, let me sleep...

15YearsWasted: They're under restrictions thanks to Melony.

ImSmort: And according to her, the rest of us are the quad's problem.

MegaSweetheart: The quad?

ImSmort: You and your siblings. Mainly you.

MegaSweetheart: Hold on, I'm going to murder someone.

Jirachi: Flora, restrain this dumbass plz.

FloraNFauna: No, don't worry, go ahead.

Jirachi: -_-

ChaoticGay: What are you up to?

BurnMeAlive: It's 10am for me, so I'm good. What's up with the rest of you?

ProtagTime: Oh shit, hi guys.

SoftBoyUwU: Good early morning everyone?

ScienceDude: Before you ask why we are up at 4AM...we've had a talk.

SoftBoyUwU: Where's the little fucker at?

ChatMumMelony: CHILDREN! LANGUAGE!

**ChatMumMelony has been kicked from the chat for 5 minutes by a moderator.**

ChaoticGay: Thank me later. So, who are you referencing?

ScienceDude: Mr Ketchum-Knocked-Up. Ash, you're 10. He's 19. What were you thinking?

ProtagTime: I was drunk. Very, very drunk. He took some drug and then one thing leaded to another and that's all I can remember. I blacked out after the damage was done.

**KingOfTheKeys has entered the chat.**

SoftBoyUwU: YOU. TALK. NOW.

KingOfTheKeys: Uh oh...do they know???

ProtagTime: I told them privately an hour ago...I couldn't keep it in, I had to, I'm sorry.

KingOfTheKeys: It's fine...

ArtisticChefBoi: What in the name of the holy stove did I just walk into?

IBeASadBean: What did you just say? Holy stove?! LMAO!!!

ArtisticChefBoi: Shut it. So, the hunters have snagged the prey and the predator has been revealed?

MegaSweetheart: I'm guessing the hunters are Clemont and Sawyer, the prey is Pierre and the predator is Ash?

ArtisticChefBoi: Bingo!

MarriedGoth: Can all of you stfu for one sec? It's 6AM and I want sleep...

MegaSweetheart: Turn off notifications then or turn your phone off.

MarriedGoth: -_-

**MarriedGoth has left the chat.**

ScienceDude: So, back to the issue at hand. Guillotine or shotgun?

KingOfTheKeys: OnO

ProtagTime: Back off or neither of you are getting any of this hunk ever again.

ScienceDude: ...

SoftBoyUwU: ...

WorldChamp38: Hunk? You're just a wafer string. XD

KingOfTheKeys: Wafer string? Really?

ProtagTime: Oh wow, did Lysandre give you that idea?

WorldChamp38: Took it from a list.

ScienceDude: We get it. We'll leave it alone.

SoftBoyUwU: Yeah, you can choose what you wish.

KingOfTheKeys: I never wanted this. He never wanted this. No one wanted this. We were drunk and not thinking properly.

FloraNFauna: Don't make it soppy.

KingOfTheKeys: -_-

WorldChamp38: This is what life has come to.

Jirachi: We need some milk.

BurnMeAlive: Shouldn't you all be in bed by now?

ProtagTime: No one cares.


	7. Welcome to Monday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Per usual, shit happens

ScienceDude: I'm regretting my life choices.

ProtagTime: You ain't the only one.

WorldChamp38: :-) 

DoctorOrders: I regret joining. 

Jirachi: Welp you're here now and can't back out.

TheSinnohQueen: Tea

ProtagTime: Not this AGAIN!

WorldChamp38: Tea

Jirachi: Tea

Misty404: Tea

BurnMeAlive: Tea

RocketMan1996: Tea

ScienceDude: There ISNT any tea! 

Jirachi: Aw man! 

WorldChamp38: I thought we were onto something.....

RibbonPrincess: You thought damn wrong

smolbean.but.mean: It's 3am on a MONDAY. WHAT THE FRICK ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING HERE!?

ProtagTime: Wasting away our lives

KingOfTheKeys: Are you sure? 

ScienceDude: Oh no...

SoftBoyUwU: Wut? Me need sleep...

ScienceDude: Sawyer get off me! 

SoftBoyUwU: Nah. You a good pillow. Night. 

KingOfTheKeys: Great. Now we got Human Pillows atop every other crazy thing....

Jirachi: What isn't crazy at this point?! Or should I say WHO 0o0

NormalGirl4: The one time I come on this disaster happens. 

WorldChamp38: it's a beautiful diaster all the time! 

ProtagTime: Yip! 

15YearsWasted: Welcome to this. 

IBeASadBean: I need a nap. 

15YearsWasted: AND Alain's asleep on me. 

ScienceDude: Welcome to the club.

15YearsWasted: What club? 

Jirachi: the h\Human Pillow Club! Obviously!


	8. Even more drama but at a reasonable time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More death threats and more petty drama

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i rly dont like how i wrote this chapter, but enjoy anyways

_truekalosqueen_: Good morning everyone!

CheetoPuff: Finally, this chat is talking at a reasonable time!

SassyLostChild: Again… _time differences._

CheetoPuff: Right…

CheetoPuff: Well, people in Kalos are awake at a reasonable time.

ScienceDude: Sawyer’s still asleep.

_truekalosqueen_: What!? It’s 10am tell him to wake up!

ScienceDude: I would but… he seems tired…

Antibeast: Maybe because you guys are going to sleep at 4 in the fucking morning.

ChatMumMelony: LANGUAGE!

ProtagTime: Woah dude you’re actually active???

Antibeast: I know. Frankly, I’m just as surprised as you are.

ProtagTime: Huh...

Antibeast: Anyways, Lillie told me how much of a disaster this chat is.

RibbonPrincess: Oh, it is.

AdorableMorpeko960: She ain’t wrong.

IBeASadBean: There’s already been murder threats.

Antibeast: Nice!

SassyLostChild: I just want the admin and everyone here to know.

SassyLostChild: I really do hate this chat and everyone in it.

ChaoticGay: Thanks.

WorldChamp38: K.

SassyLostChild: Except for my trans bitches.

LostBoi: :^)

MegaSweetheart: Thank you???

Legend4Life: TRANS ARMY!!!

CheetoPuff: I weirdly still feel offended, but thanks I guess???

LochNessaMonster: Just take it as a compliment.

ChoccyMilk: It’s for the best…

CheetoPuff: Okay then.

ContestContender: There’s too much drama in this chat. Can’t we have wholesome hours for once???

ImSmort: No.

15YearsWasted: Wholesome doesn’t exist here…

nini_is_trying: Well, I would like to participate in the wholesome hours.

nini_is_trying: Miette you look rather beautiful today. UwU

bluehair-dontcare: Why thank you! UwU

Misty404: I’ll go next.

Misty404: Ash, you look like an ugly whore.

ContestContender: Wow, okay…

ChatMumMelody: Language!!! There are children present!!!

Bea193: Yeah! Allister’s in this chat!

ProtagTime: Right back at ya, slutbag.

ScienceDude: _Ash Ketchum_

ProtagTime: What!? She came at me first!

Doc. B: Ash! Misty!

Doc. B: Wholesome hours! _Wholesome!_

Misty404: Right. Wholesome.

Misty404: Ash I hope someone shoots a hole through your face.

ContestContender: Oh my Arceus…

ChoccyMilk: That got dark fast… 

ItsFabulousBish: Someone control this chat!!!

UltimateDad: There’s no controlling this mess…

IBeASadBean: The list of death threats just keeps increasing…

RibbonPrincess: I hate it here!!

ChaoticGay: Lmao, this drama is so entertaining.


	9. Brownies Galore

WeedBrownie: Brownies anyone? I just made a fresh batch. Am borrowing Lear’s Hoopa for delivering.

PrinceLife: They’re real good!

FloraNFauna: Don’t mind if I do. :D

ProtagTime: Brownies fuck yeah. :D

ChatMumMelony: …This mummy needs a break. Augustine, you take it from here. u.u

MegaSweetheart: No, I surrendered...Long long ago. Let the kids swear, being a swear monitor is tiring.

ChatMumMelony: Oh btw Gordiekins! The tailor just called for you and Piers to try on the tux and gown. ;) Don’t forget to go.

LoverBoulder: Got it mum! 

ChaoticGay: Gown? Wooot. 

MarriedGoth: Hell yeah. It’s gonna be black like my eyeshadow. 

bluehair-dontcare: …What kind of gay wedding has the groom in a black gown?

ChaoticGay: Hush!

Jirachi: Goth wedding neato.

smolbean.but.mean: Ooh brownies yummy. :D

ScienceDude: Don’t eat too much Bonnie. ^^” We don’t want a sugar rush like last time.

GurlOnFire: Dw Zinnia’s brownies are just right they’re…wait a second.

ArtisticChefBoi: SACRE BLEU!!!

LoverBoulder: *chokes*

ProtagTime: What? It’s just brownies.

LostBoi: xhsjsjajajajaj I’m starting to remember my stantler party.

ColdAsIce: ...Kabu didn’t you tell me about an incident concerning weed brownies-

UltimateDad: No.

ChatBrotherLance: For the love of---Zinnia, that better not contain weed. None of us Galar twits want a repeat of what happened in Fools house…

SassyLostChild: Twit?? Excuse me bruh.

PrinceLife: Chill Bede.

WeedBrownie: You dumbasses. Not every brownie I make has weed in it ffs.

ProtagTime: O.O

ProtagTime: You’re right! 

ScienceDude: Ash, pls dont be high, dont be high.

ProtagTime: I’m not. Seriously these brownies are awesome! Have some!

ScienceDude: Oh...They taste like lemony chocolate! :D

WeedBrownie: New recipe.

SoftBoyUwU: ...Why do I wake up to my guys munching? 

ProtagTime: Brownies.

ScienceDude: Brownies.

smolbean.but.mean: Yummy brownies.

SoftBoyUwU: Well, time for breakfast. Leave me some weed brownies! 

ProtagTime: Yeah yeah get in here---HOLY FUCK HELL NO UR TOO BBY FOR WEED!!!

ProtagTime: SAWYER!!!

ScienceDude: Nonononono Sawyer stay away from the weed.

WeedBrownie: FOR FUCKS SAKE!

UltimateDad: Don’t worry Zinnia I believe you. Boys calm down. There’s no weed in those brownies. If there are, one of you would be setting the pool on fire as we speak.

GurlOnFire: Setting the pool on fire? Hehehehehe.

ScienceDude: ??? Who sets a pool on fire???

UltimateDad: Hush children. And eat your brownies.


	10. Special News + Drunkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looks like Piers and Gordie won't be alone on the gay wedding train. Oh, and someone brings alcohol.

WorldChamp38: A brownie? Really?

WeedBrownie: Just try it.

WorldChamp38: Oh! Oh wow, this is good!

WeedBrownie: It was the last one.

ProtagTime: You left a single brownie for six hours?

WeedBrownie: Yeah.

JustANormalGuy: Guys...I have a problem.

IBeASadBean: Oh boy...

JustANormalGuy: I set a waterfall on fire. ^v^'

GurlOnFire: I thought setting water on fire was Kabu's problem.

JustANormalGuy: He's busy celebrating with Pryce.

ChatMumMelony: About what, Norman dear?

JustANormalGuy: Hold on. @ColdAsIce @UltimateDad. Get your asses over here.

ChatMumMelony: Language.

JustANormalGuy: No one cares.

ColdAsIce: UwU

Antibeast: Ah, the chat hasn't gone crazy this time.

NormalGirl4: I'm surprised myself.

ProtagTime: News. Spill.

UltimateDad: Well, I would just like to announce that Gordie and Piers aren't the only ones making plans. Me and my new fiance will need to make plans as well. :)

StabbyStabby: W O W.

ArtisticChefBoi: Finally active, Wikstrom?

StabbyStabby: I was bored.

MarriedGoth: You're engaged?!

ColdAsIce: Yeah! The ring is gorgeous.

ChatMumMelony: Congrats you two...

WorldChamp38: Sad mother alert.

ChatMumMelony: !!!

ColdAsIce: Don't be sad. You can still be cheerful, even without a partner. You have Gordie and Wulfric as actual family and the rest of us as chat family.

ChatMumMelony: Why thank you!

ColdAsIce: Still a hoe tho.

ChatMumMelony: HOW DARE YOU!

UltimateDad: You two, calm down.

**UnlimitedPower has entered the chat.**

UnlimitedPower: GUESS WHO'S GOT VODKA!!!

ChatMumMelony: One whole bottle. Please. I need a break.

ArtisticChefBoi: I'm in!

ProtagTime: FUCK YEAH, ALCOHOL!

ChatMumMelony: I'm getting vodka, I don't even care now.

MarriedGoth: @LoverBoulder. Plz get our mum under control.

LoverBoulder: OnO, you broke her swear detector.

UnlimitedPower: Are you in or not?

LoverBoulder: OF COURSE!

MarriedGoth: I'll join, I guess.

JustANormalGuy: Four shots!

Snekki: Two for me!

JustANormalGuy: Make that six!

Snekki: You're having four shots to yourself?

JustANormalGuy: Why not!

( SEVERAL SHOTS FOR EVERYONE LATER... )

**KingOfTheKeys has entered the chat.**

KingOfTheKeys: What the fuck happened here?

ProtagTime: I feel like a floof ball...ehh...

PrinceLife: It was one big shot...one big shot...

ArtisticChefBoi: Ugh...my stomach hurts...

ScienceDude: Thank goodness I only took half a shot.

SoftBoyUwU: (hic) You coward...

ScienceDude: ÒnÓ

ColdAsIce: Yee haw, I'm a cowboy, ridin' into the sunset...

UltimateDad: I'm tired...

KingOfTheKeys: You people are crazy. Too crazy.


	11. DONT GIVE ASH....too late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone gives Ash two bottle of vodka that he drinks alone...wtf happens now?

ProtagTime: I feel like I could FLY!!!

Antibeast: I thought this was starting to be normal! 

Enkidu: You thought. Clemont gave Ash two bottles of Vodka. Watch the end result.

ScienceDude: Sorry, dammit! Ash, SIT DOWN!!! 

KingOfTheKeys: WTF is happening over there?! 

SoftBoyUwU: We need a fricken tranquilizer. Ash won't sit down and is destroying EVERYTHING!!!

ScienceDude: Someone help!

WorldChamp38: Uh..sorry, I'm busy. 

Jirachi: I'm not, but I'm also not getting involved

TheSinnohQueen: For all those times I have spare tranquilizers lying around... 

ScienceDude: You do?!

ProtagTime: Nuh-uh! I'm never coming down off this high. WEEEE!!

Antibeast: For the love of Arceus....

BurnMeAlive: I'm on my way with them, Sawyer. Clemont. 

SoftBoyUwU: Good! Ash is trying to jump off the roof!!!!

StabbyStabby: Well...he jumped off Prism Tower before...

ScienceDude: That was for Pikachu! And he was perfectly sober! WTF was I THINKING!? He's 10!!!!!

Bowtieman: Seriously Clemont. You messed up.

ScienceDude: I couldn't tell. 

BurnMeAlive: Clemont, Sawyer has them. He's on his way up. I gave em to him. 

ScienceDude: Thank Arceus.

Jirachi: Good to know you have a solution. 

WorldChamp38: Will it work is the question. 

FloraNFauna: I hope so. Ash is giving me a headache.

MegaSweetheart: He's giving us ALL a headache. 

ScienceDude: I just injected one into Ash's arm...he finally passed out. 

WorldChamp38: He's gonna have a huge hangover when he finally gets up. 

ChaoticGay: Well he can't drive us nuts, that's what matters! 

Jirachi: You said it, now I need a nap. 

ScienceDude: Why? It's only noon in Kalos. 

Jirachi: You don't want to know what time it is where I am. 

Antibeast: I want to put an end to this chat. And ask WHY AM I INVOLVED?!

WorldChamp38: Are you regretting some life decisions? 

Antibeast: 0o0... yes. 


	12. Nessa shouldn't say some stuff around Allister

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fight almost goes down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey it's leaf and again, i'm sorry this is so late :( but enjoy!

ProtagTime: My head hurts…

RibbonPrincess: Well maybe you shouldn’t have drank all that alcohol!

ProtagTime: I didn’t know what I was doing!

ProtagTime: One minute I was downing vodka, and then the next minute I was on the rooftop with Clemont stabbing me with a tranquilizer. 

ProtagTime: I don’t know how I got from point A to point B but it happened.

Antibeast: Dumbass…

ChatMumMelony: And this is why you don’t drink kids!

LoverBoulder: Mum, you were literally drinking as well.

ChatMumMelony: Shh…

LoverBoulder: o_o

ProtagTime: Sawyer, Clemont, come cuddle with me. :(

ScienceDude: Can’t, I’m working the gym.

ProtagTime: Lame.

SoftBoyUwU: I’m coming.

ProtagTime: Yay! :)

ContestContender: So, how’s everyone’s day been?

ThirstyGay: Boring.

I<3Garbage: Fine.

ChoccyMilk: Good!

SassyLostChild: Those are lame answers.

ThirstyGay: You’re lame.

SassyLostChild: No, you.

ThirstyGay: >:(

_truekalosqueen_: Pierre, how’s the pregnancy going?

KingOfTheKeys: Fine.

KingOfTheKeys: Morning sickness sucks.

CheetoPuff: I would assume so.

WorldChamp38: This chat is so boring. I want something exciting to happen!

Jirachi: Same.

LochNessaMonster: Sup guys, I’m finally online.

ScientificPeach: Hi, Nessa!

15YearsWasted: Got any wise words of wisdom, miss gym leader?

LochNessaMonster: Why yes, I do.

LochNessaMonster: Skate fast, smoke grass, and eat ass. ;)

RainDragon: Nice.

LilPureBoi: What does that mean?

LochNessaMonster: …

LochNessaMonster: … uhhh…

Bea193: NESSA!

LochNessaMonster: I’M SORRY!

Bea193: I’m coming over there, and I’m gonna beat the shit out of you.

LochNessaMonster: WAIT, NO, PLEASE!

ChoccyMilk: Um…

ChoccyMilk: Nessa and I are training together, and she just got up and sprinted out of the gym screaming, “I HAVE TOO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!”

LilPureBoi: Bea just started sprinting to Hulbury, as well.

LilPureBoi: I’m still so confused…

ScientificPeach: You’ll understand when you’re older.

LilPureBoi: ???

WorldChamp38: Finally, something interesting is happening.

ChaoticGay: I know right.


	13. Broken As Heck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can't think of a title oh welp *shrug* x'D

LochNessaMonster: ……..

Bea193: ………….

ScientificPeach: Bea, u broke my girlfriend, congrats.

LoverBoulder: Glad it's not me. u.u

FloraNFauna: How far did Bea go exactly? 

LochNessaMonster: My ankles. Bea chased me around so much they got sore from running.

ChoccyMilk: Ouch.

LochNessaMonster: Dude I may be a gymnast but my feet’s got limits!

Bea193: Sorry Nessa. But seriously, if you had a little sibling in this very same chat room you’d know what it’s like.

ScienceDude: Wait, how old is your brother again?

LilPureBoi: S-seven...

ScienceDude: Oh...Ok what.

ProtagTime: fhsjsjsjajajajaja NO WONDER!

SoftBoyUwU: Ash, lie down, you had a massive hangover.

LochNessaMonster: God I keep forgetting. Forget what you saw Alli.

LilPureBoi: O-ok.

WorldChamp38: Eh if ever Allister breaks we can handle one more.

ProtagTime: Hell yeah.

ThirstyGay: We’re all broken anyways.

LilPureBoi: I don’t understand? 

Bea193: It’s nothing Alli...Just go eat your cheezits.

LilPureBoi: Ok. 

LostBoi: Got room for a tired papa guys? 

RainDragon: There there big guy.

KingOfTheKeys: Papa? Wait Leon you have kids???

ChatMumMelony: …You didn’t know? 

KingOfTheKeys: No?

ProtagTime: Nope.

Jirachi: Oh right different houses.

LostBoi: Yeah I got two baby dragons <3 Raiah and Lance, or Lil Lan as we call him.

ChatBrotherLance: They named him after me.

ProtagTime: And nobody named their baby after me I’m hurt ;_; Arceus’ child is hurt.

ScienceDude: Arceus’...what? 

SoftBoyUwU: ????? 

_truekalosqueen_: Did Ash just call himself Arceus’ child? 

PapaKukui: Hey calm down. I’m a papa to be too remember? Nani and I got plans yeah u3u Ash deserves the honour actually.

MamaKukui: I agree <3

MarriedGoth: Fuck I gotta puke. Excuse me.

WorldChamp38: (gasp)

LoverBoulder: O_O

SassyLostChild: Shotgun wedding I’m calling it.

LoverBoulder: Oi chairman, please control your lil gremlin.

SassyLostChild: Gremlin?!? 

ImSmort: Calm down Bede dear. u.u


	14. The General Problems + Trans Army

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People go wild, what else is there to add?

PrinceLife: Fuck.

ImSmort: What's wrong?

PrinceLife: Leah just broke some of our shot glasses. I'm barefoot in my pyjamas right now, I don't want to get hurt, but I don't want Leah hurt either.

LostBoi: I'm currently being used as a firefighter pole. -_-

KingOfTheKeys: I feel like a fucking fire hydrant.

SpeedyBoi: Ben's trying to settle Chris down...he burnt his hand.

Bea193: If Allister was active, Melony would be going ham right now.

ChatMumMelony: Everyone active is an adult or teen. Allister is our only child chatting here. Plus, I feel horrible right now.

ColdAsIce: I swear to Arceus, if it's a cold...

ChatMumMelony: No, food poisoning. I was trying one of Siebold's new recipes he made.

ArtisticChefBoi: Oh no...

LoverBoulder: Come here. ÒnÓ

ArtisticChefBoi: _Stella, help, plz._

ArtsyMulti: **You lay a finger on my brother, I'll snap that fucking XL sized neck of yours.**

MegaSweetheart: OHHH!!! YOU'LL NEED A BURN HEAL FOR THAT!

LoverBoulder: Haha, good one. -_-

Legend4Life: Guys, I think I'm pregnant.

SassyLostChild: Tobias, what the fuck happened?

Legend4Life: IDK, I'm late on my period...oh wait...give me a sec.

MegaSweetheart: If he is, we must assemble.

CheetoPuff: Did someone call?

LostBoi: No one called.

SassyLostChild: Trans Army to Agent 3, I repeat---

ProtagTime: WTF are you saying, Bede?

SassyLostChild: It's a little thing we started. The numbers go from oldest to youngest. I didn't know Trevor was actually older than me, so I'm 5, he's 4, Leon is 2 and Augustine is 1.

ProtagTime: And Tobias is 3?

SassyLostChild: Yes.

Legend4Life: Whew, false alarm, it was just a little late today.

IBeASadBean: Guys, I need help.

ProtagTime: WHAT?!

IBeASadBean: How do you stop a screaming person?

MegaSweetheart: What's wrong with Adam?

IBeASadBean: Not my son, my boyfriend.

15YearsWasted: From what I'm seeing right now, he's currently bleeding from his arm.

IBeASadBean: Is there a bandage on it?

15YearsWasted: Yes.

IBeASadBean: I put it there, dumbass. Give me a hand.

MegaSweetheart: Brb, gotta give Kain a heads up.

**MegaSweetheart has left the chat.**

MarriedGoth: Who the fuck are these people now?

WorldChamp38: Part human, part werewolf from a different world. One of them is a bodyguard. The other is a very experienced swordsman.

PrinceLife: Leah situation is sorted!

Jirachi: Good for you.

FloraNFauna: Why is there weed in my room?

ChaoticGay: Uhh...

FloraNFauna: Leaf. What did you do?

ChaoticGay: Gotcha.

FloraNFauna: Hey, what are you---OI! GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!

Jirachi: OnO

WorldChamp38: Why did I give you three a house together?

Jirachi: Because you're nice?

WorldChamp38: Maybe.

PrinceLife: Fuck.

ImSmort: Oh no, not again.

PrinceLife: I have glass in my foot. It really hurts. Lys has it sorted.

WorldChamp38: How can this day get any crazier?

JustANormalGuy: Guys, I broke a window. ^v^'

ProtagTime: Oh for fuck's sake...


	15. So Help Me..WHO KEEPS GIVING ASH ALCOHOL?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WHO GAVE ASH MORE ALCOHOL!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I randomly decided to go with this idea. IDK what i was thinking XD.

ScienceDude: Ash is FINALLY off his hangover and is fast asleep.

SoftBoyUwU: Uh...Clemont....Problem. 

ScienceDude: What NOW? I JUST sat down. 

SoftBoyUwU: It's Ash....I found another 48oz bottle of vodka that looks to be previously drained. 

WorldChamp38: Who keeps GIVING HIM THIS STUFF?!

Jirachi: I have no idea but I'm hiding under my bed if you need me. 

ProtagTime: I SCREAM YOU SCREAM WE ALL SCREAM FOR ICE CREAM!!!!!!

Antibeast: For Arceus' sake.... 

ScienceDude: That does it. I'm going back through his closet. HOLY-

SoftBoyUwU: What is it?

ScienceDude: ITS LIKE ASH HAS A FRICKEN LIQUOR STORE IN HIS CLOSET! 

FloraNFauna: I'm honestly not surprised. 

ProtagTime: YAHOO!!! HEIGHTS ARE AWESOME!!!! I COULD TOUCH THE MOON!!!! LALALALALA!!!!!! 

ScienceDude: Or break all the windows in our house. 

Antibeast: That explains why Masterette's hiding under her bed. She has common sense.

WorldChamp38: Who has common sense anymore? 

KingOfTheKeys: How did our lives take such an....interesting turn? 

ProtagTime: YAHOOY!! I'M GONNA GO TO CHINA AND BACK!!!!!! 

ContestContender: What happened to him after he left Sinnoh?! 

Doc.B: I'll let you know once I figure that one out for myself.

Bowtieman: Uh...Did Ash leave the house guys?

ScienceDude: UH OH. Yeah. 

Bowtieman: Well he's swinging from my chandelier like a monkey!!!

SoftBoyUwU: I have another tranquilizer. I'm OTW!

ContestContender: You guys deserve a medal for the disaster that goes on around here 99% of the time. 

WorldChamp38: You're telling us. 


	16. Bottle Donation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sawyer and Clemont deal with Ash's.... problem...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk what else to say except enjoy the chapter lmao

Bowtieman: I never knew watching Ash Ketchum get tranquilized would be so funny.

AdowableDragon: I need details! NOW!

IBeASadBean: I would also like to know what happened because I’m a little concerned.

Bowtieman: Okay so basically…

Bowtieman: Sawyer shows up to my house, and he’s practically FUMING.

Bowtieman: Ash is still swinging from my chandelier like a crackhead, and Sawyer’s yelling at him to get down.

Bowtieman: Ash tells him, “You’re not my mom, you can’t tell me what to do!” It was like watching a married couple fight.

Bowtieman: So in spite of this, Sawyer climbs on top of the table to reach Ash (cause he’s short AF) and then proceeds to STAB him in the leg with the tranquilizer.

Bowtieman: Ash instantly falls asleep and falls off my chandelier and onto the table. I ask if he’s okay and Sawyer just rolls his eyes (LIKE IT’S A NORMAL THING) and says, “He’ll be fine.”

Bowtieman: It was both concerning and oddly entertaining.

Antibeast: Well, damn.

ThirstyGay: That’s…

ThirstyGay: I don’t even know.

SoftBoyUwU: Ash is currently asleep.

SoftBoyUwU: Let’s hope it stays that way.

TotallyNOTTierno: Sawyer’s FED UP.

ChatMumMelony: LOL!

LoverBoulder: Did…

LoverBoulder: Did my mum just say LOL?

ChatMumMelony: Why yes I did!

ChatMumMelony: It’s the cool thing kids say these days, right?

LoverBoulder: Sure…

ScienceDude: So on another note,

ScienceDude: We are currently giving away Ash’s collection of vodka, so first come first serve.

ThirstyGay: Sweet!!

ScienceDude: Not you, Shauna, you’re underage.

ThirstyGay: Ash is too!

ScienceDude: Exactly. We’re trying to STOP the underage drinking problem by giving the alcohol to the people who can legally drink it.

ThirstyGay: Lame. >:(

ArtisticChefBoi: I’ll take a bottle, Clemont.

MegaSweetheart: Same here!

CheetoPuff: Professor?

MegaSweetheart: I study Pokemon all day, child. I need a break every now and then.

CheetoPuff: Fair.

I<3Garbage: Could you mail some bottles to Galar, possibly?

ScienceDude: We can try?

SoftBoyUwU: Isn’t there like, a rule against mailing liquids?

ScienceDude: YOLO.

KingOfTheKeys: I would take a bottle but…

KingOfTheKeys: Drinking while pregnant is kinda the one thing you’re not supposed to do.

ScienceDude: Understandable, have a nice day.

ChaoticGay: Well, I’m glad the whole Ash situation worked out!

IBeASadBean: For now…

WorldChamp38: For now?

IBeASadBean: There’s no stopping Ash…

SoftBoyUwU: I swear to Arceus, if we have to send him to rehab, I’m going to cry.

RibbonPrincess: Good luck y’all…

ScienceDude: Thanks...


	17. Vodka Blues and News

I<3Garbage: Thank you for the liquor. They've arrived safely in Galar. I'm on my way to claim them before my son does.

ScienceDude: *choke*

ImSmort: Bede please stay away from the alcohol. You'll become like Ash.

SassyLostChild: But I won't drink THAT much! I've got sense unlike Arceus' spawn -_- 

AdorableMorpeko960: Bede I wanna drink with you wait for me.

SassyLostChild: It's vodka. Yes, get over here Marnie. <3

ImSmort: Bede!!!

QuestionablyQuestionable: Hush, let my pink grandson and future granddaughter-in-law drink.

AdorableMorpeko960: Yes.

SassyLostChild: Got a bottle.

I<3Garbage: …One wouldn't hurt.

ProtagTime: Uh...wha??

ThirstyGay: Oh no, he's awake.

WorldChamp38: Relax, we should be safe.

ProtagTime: Wait a sec...

ScienceDude: Oh no.

ProtagTime: WHERE IS MY VODKA?!

I<3Garbage: Well...

SoftBoyUwU: Ash, calm down.

AdowableDwagon: Sorry Ash, it's for your own good. ^^"

PapaKukui: Ash you're too young for this drink yeah.

ProtagTime: I. Am. Arceus' spawn! I have the right! And I can!

ProtagTime: Oh shit.

ProtagTime: Professor Burnet just yelled at me to stop with the alcohol.

MamaKukui: You really should! 

ChatMumMelony: You speak my language Burnet. ^.^

MarriedGoth: Uhh guys sorry to break the alcohol talk but…I just took a test…It's positive...

LoverBoulder: *gasp* 

SassyLostChild: TIS A SHOTGUN WEDDING!

ImSmort: Bede calm down the Vodka is hurting you. ;_; 

I<3Garbage: Our son speaks the truth Rose. 

ProtagTime: THAT VODKA IS MINE!

Jirachi: WAS yours!

SoftBoyUwU: Tranquilized him again.

ScienceDude: Wow what an eventful day...and congrats Piers! 

LostBoi: OMFA my breathren is pregnant.

KingOfTheKeys: Welcome to the boat. Glad to have company. 

ChatMumMelony: :'DDD

LoverBoulder: Am Papa. :'( My heart.


	18. DELIVERY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy. The new child and more tranquilizers. The real question is, where the hell does Cynthia get so many tranquilizers?

KingOfTheKeys: Oh shit...

ProtagTime: OnO

WorldChamp38: What's up?

KingOfTheKeys: It's time.

DoctorOrders: Hold on, get to Succour if you can.

ChatMumMelony: Succour?

DoctorOrders: Best hospital in Kalos. I own the fucking place.

ChatMumMelony: Language.

DoctorOrders: -_-

KingOfTheKeys: I've done this once before, I can do it again.

MegaSweetheart: You're 14 years younger than me and have got two more kids than me. Well, in a few hours.

KingOfTheKeys: Ok, I'm there. I'll be back when I'm done.

**KingOfTheKeys has left the chat.**

Jirachi: I hope he'll be ok...

WorldChamp38: He should be.

(A FEW HOURS LATER...)

**KingOfTheKeys has entered the chat.**

MarriedGoth: Oh gracious one, what is thy wisdom?

KingOfTheKeys: What the fuck???

LoverBoulder: Advice. Spill.

KingOfTheKeys: Ok, don't smoke, don't drink alcohol, don't do parkour, after four months you should stay inside most of the time and don't be an asshole when you get hormonal.

ChatMumMelony: Language. What's the gender?

KingOfTheKeys: It's a girl.

IBeASadBean: What's her name?

KingOfTheKeys: Well, I had a look through a long list, bounced some ideas off of Ash and we settled on one. August.

TechnicalHeart: That sounds familiar...

IBeASadBean: Where have you been all this time?

TechnicalHeart: Chat's too boring. Now we're getting into the good stuff.

KingOfTheKeys: So about the name, you know how one of Leon's and Raihan's kids is named after Lance?

ChatBrotherLance: WHOMST HAS SUMMONED THE ALMIGHTY ONE?!

KingOfTheKeys: No one summoned you.

ChatBrotherLance: Oh.

KingOfTheKeys: So, you guys know that, right? Well, we decided on going that route.

MegaSweetheart: Wait a minute...

KingOfTheKeys: She's named after you, Augustine. :)

MegaSweetheart: ...

IBeASadBean: Achievement unlocked...make a chat member cry.

KingOfTheKeys: Aww.

ProtagTime: So...on another note...do I have parental duties now?

KingOfTheKeys: You, Sawyer, Clemont and I can take care of her together.

**BurnMeAlive has entered the chat.**

BurnMeAlive: Does anyone have any more tranquilizers?

ProtagTime: I'm not drunk though.

BurnMeAlive: Not you, Will took the rest of the vodka he had originally given out and is stumbling around everywhere.

TheSinnohQueen: Flint, you should have a spare in your room.

BurnMeAlive: Nope, used that on Roark, he stole three bottles of whiskey and chugged them all down.

TheSinnohQueen: Hold on, I have more. Sending them now.

BurnMeAlive: Cheers.

ChatBrotherLance: I've got him pinned down. Have at it!

BurnMeAlive: It's in...and he's out. Alright. That should solve it.

ChatBrotherLance: Huzzah. Hold on...I have an idea.

BurnMeAlive: What,

ChatBrotherLance: Steal his mask.

BurnMeAlive: Fuck no.

ChatBrotherLance: Fine. I'll do it myself.

KingOfTheKeys: I'm just going to leave. Ash, come on.

ProtagTime: Ok!

**KingOfTheKeys and ProtagTime have left the chat.**

WorldChamp38: Well, this has been one crazy day.


	19. Can It EVER Be Normal?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once again, no clue what I was thinking.....

Antibeast: Is everyone back to normal now? 

NormalGirl4: I sure hope so. 

ProtagTime: They stole my alcohol so....yeah. 

Antibeast: WHO WOULD BE DUMB ENOUGH TO FRICKEN GIVE YOU OF ALL PEOPLE ALCOHOL?!?!?!

ScienceDude: To catch you up, he basically had a liquor store in his closet that ended with him ending on Cilan's table. 

WorldChamp38: And it was HILARIOUS!!!!

Antibeast: When I last left, Masterette was under her bed. Is she still under there? 

Jirachi: Yeah, staying on the safe side. 

FloraNFauna: It's been two days. Get out from under there, or I'LL come and get you out from under there. 

Jirachi: Okay, fine. 

WorldChamp38: Remind me to never give you three housing arrangements together again. 

ProtagTime: What kind of old-timey language is that? 

NormalGirl4: It's proper grammer, Ash. Go back to school. 

Bowtieman: I Yi Yi. 

AdowableDwagon: What's wrong with YOU now?!

Bowtieman: I just...I gotta go! 

SoftBoyUwU: Huh? 

ProtagTime: I'm lonely. Sawyer, Clemont....you guys around? 

SoftBoyUwU: OMW

ScienceDude: Yeah, yeah...I'll give in for once if it keeps you sober

WorldChamp38: Aww....sweet. 

Antibeast: Let me puke now. 

ChaoticGay: Why? 

Antibeast: I despise love. Too sweet for me.

NormalGirl4: R U SURE about that? 

Antibeast: Yes. Very sure. Surer than anyone else here. 

Misty404: About time we find this chat to be normal. 

Doc.B: Yeah, for one day. Who knows what tommorow will bring. 

ScienceDude: Huston, we got a problem. 

Antibeast: NOW WHAT?! I thought-

ScienceDude: Welp, you probably THOUGHT wrong. Ash wants to go hang gliding. 

ProtagTime: What could possibly go wrong?


	20. He Who Handglides The World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Which Ash SOMEHOW glides the world on a handglider

ChatMumMelony: Why is there a screaming UFO? Or is it just me?

SassyLostChild: Oh no it's the Ash isn't it

FloraNFauna: UFOs dont scream like high maniacs

WeedBrownie: It is the Ash

LoverBoulder: The Ash lmfao

SoftBoiUwU: xhsjsjakkakaks sorry

ScienceDude: Ash insisted on handgliding. It seemed harmless so we let him go

Antibeast: You fools

ChatBrotherLance: HE'S FLYING OVER GALAR WHO HANDGLIDES THAT FAR??? 

SoftBoiUwU: Ash duh

SticksAndStones: ????? How chaotic can this child get

ChatBrotherLance: Babes do something I think I lost sight of him

TheSinnohQueen: Shall I shoot him with a tranquilizer if he flies over Sinnoh?

ChatBrotherLance: Yes

ScienceDude: He's legit enjoying this don't take it from him

WorldChamp38: Bold of you to assume he wasn't enjoying being high either

ItsFabulousBish: I'll get the mattresses in case he crashlands in Hoenn

ItsFabulousBish: Oh there he is now, Wally found him brb

ItsFabulousBish: Crap missed him

LostBoi: Help 

RainDragon: Lost again babe? 

LostBoi: No

LostBoi: Ash is

LostBoi: I SEE THE LIGHT

LoverBoulder: Ouch

ScienceDude: What happened?? 

MarriedGoth: Relax kid. Your gremlin just collided right into Leon. In Lumiose City Kalos, accordin to the Leon tracker.

ChaoticGay: Leon tracker lol

ScienceDude: ?!?!? I can see them at the top of the Prism tower?? I can get Ash but how on earth did Leon get there?? 

RainDragon: It's Leon - 3 - He can go anywhere


	21. Another Day, More Craziness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title explains it all. Oh, and Tobias and Clemont sorta got heavily drunk.

MegaSweetheart: What has just happened?

ProtagTime: I FLEW AROUND THE WORLD IN TEN MINUTES!!!

LostBoi: On a handglider with no supervision.

Legend4Life: I HAVE SEVERAL QUESTIONS.

WorldChamp38: Expected that.

BurnMeAlive: Oh shit.

ScienceDude: What's going on?

BurnMeAlive: I sorta just shot Cynthia with one of the tranq darts by mistake...right in the ass as well.

ChatBrotherLance: >:(

Sticks&Stone: >:(

ItsFabulousBish: >:(

FloraNFauna: Boi, you better run.

Legend4Life: And...he's out for the count. According to a message I got from the Sinnoh chat.

SassyLostChild: If you're not in Sinnoh, where the fuck are you?

Legend4Life: I'm in a room...in Kalos...with a note. I sorta got a little drunk last night...

IBeASadBean: And by a little, he was literally tripping everywhere. I'm a little hung over myself. From what I remember, he went off with some guy and I just went back to the Lab.

LostBoi: TOBIAS, WTF?! YOU DID A ONE NIGHT STAND?!?!

Legend4Life: It was insane, but it's very hazy...I can't even remember if he used protection or not.

MegaSweetheart: Have you got a name or anything?

Legend4Life: All I got was a letter C on a post-it note with a sketch of Prism Tower on it.

SoftBoyUwU: Wait, Clemont, why did you head out last night?

ScienceDude: I headed to the bar, I needed time to think. I must've had tons to drink since I literally had no idea what happened. All I remember is I gave someone a room in Prism Tower.

Legend4Life: ...

ScienceDude: ...

Legend4Life: Oh my fucking god, it was you.

ProtagTime: I left for a minute for some water---WHAT THE FUCK?!?! **TOBIAS?! CLEMONT?! _YOU DID WHAT?!?!_**

TheSinnohQueen: What happened???

BurnMeAlive: I'm dizzy...

KingOfTheKeys: This is like my whole knock up scenario all over again.

Legend4Life: I really hope your drunk self was smart enough to remember a condom.

ScienceDude: I hope so too. I already have two kids to deal with.

ProtagTime: The only kid we have is August.

ScienceDude: The second one is you, dumbass.

ProtagTime: Oh...makes sense, I guess.

KingOfTheKeys: Wait a month and we'll see if we add another. Then we'll have a quintuplet of parents. I think that's the term, anyways.

Legend4Life: Oh gosh, what is Paul going to say if I really am pregnant this time???

ScienceDude: Well, I already know the reaction of my boyfriends. If this does happen to be true, then we honestly just need Sawyer to get heavily drunk with someone.

SoftBoyUwU: Nope. I'm loyal.

ProtagTime: _Are you saying we're not loyal?_

SoftBoyUwU: No! Of course not!

Jirachi: I have just come on...TO THIS?!

WorldChamp38: How can this get any crazier.

ColdAsIce: We still have a wedding to plan here. Well, two technically.

WorldChamp38: Of course...

LostBoi: Life is crazy.


	22. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING!?!?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Insanity occurs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Simply, shit happens

ProtagTime: I think I want to go hang gliding again.

ScienceDude: FUCK NO! We have enough problems without you trying to be a bird. 

ProtagTime: What could be worse than me?

WorldChamp38: Uh.. A VERY Pissed off Cynthia. 

TheSinnohQueen: IMMA GONNA KILL FLINT!!! TEAR HIM LIMB FOR LIMB AND ENJOY IT!!!!!

BurnMeAlive: I'm not here... O-O

ProtagTime: I see. *pulls out magnifying glass*

Antibeast: You're not a detective, jackass. 

Bowtieman: WTF is going ON here?!

Jirachi: That is a wonderful question. To witch I have no answer. 

RibbonPrincess: Well...let's see...in the past couple weeks.. Do you want here or the entire run-down of Ashtivity? In this World or in others? 

Bowtieman: Nvm. Forget it. 

FloraNFauna: Okie..now what do we do now that everyone is sober? 

ScienceDude: We could figure out why I loaned a room in Prism Tower. 

Misty404: Oh god...that doesn't sound good. Clemont, I thought you were a responsible person!

ScienceDude: That makes two of us.

KingOfTheKeys: At least it wasn't me this time!

Antibeast: Oh..Kay...Totally not suspicious. 

QuestionablyQuestionable: Are ya sure about that? 

ProtagTime: I'm bored. Off to jump off the tallest building in the Kalos Region. 

ScienceDude: FUCK NO SO HELP ME SAWYER AND I WILL TIE YOU TO YOUR BED IF YOU ATTEMPT TO JUMP OFF MY GYM AGAIN. 

SoftBoyUwU: I will? 

Antibeast: Arceus, Save us now..

NormalGirl4: You wish. 


	23. New Tea

ScienceDude: Bless whoever saved Ash from falling to his doom

LilPureBoi: Y-Your welcome

Antibeast: How

Bea193: Don't question my little brother edgelord

SassyLostChild: Edgelord lmfao

IBeASadBean: Who dares challenge my title?

Antibeast: No one

SoftBoiUwU: Gladion

AdowableDwagon: Gladion

WorldChamp38: Gladion

LilPureBoi: G-Gladion 

IBeASadBean: Try me bitch

Antibeast: wtf 

FloraNFauna: Wow that's a new word coming from you Alain

IBeASadBean: Thanks

ProtagTime: Ooh Gladion is the new Tea? Thank 

ScienceDude: Tea

Misty404: Tea

SoftBoiUwU: Tea

ProtagTime: STAHP

Legend4Life: Um hello??? We have a situation here that cannot be ignored??

MarriedGoth: Somebody's experiencin early mood swings

Legend4Life: IM NOT 

ChatMumMelony: Oh dearies those won't come until later on in the trimester <3

Legend4Life: Dad army? Is this true?

KingOfTheKeys: Yes

PrinceLife: Yes

LostBoi: Yes

ItsFabulousBish: Yes. Also Flint, no talk. Me, Lan, Steve and Tia are still angy.

BurnMeAlive: Meap

SassyLostChild: Yes

SassyLostChild: wait what NO

QuestionablyQuestionable: Ohoho a great grandchild~

ImSmort: My son!!!

I<3Garbage: Bede are you hiding something from us?

SassyLostChild: NO 

ImSmort: Are you sure? ;_; 

SassyLostChild: Dad ffs I'm only bloody 16 I'd never get pregnant or impregnate someone unlike a certain somebody 

ScienceDude: Excuse me?? 

Legend4Life: Calm down foolish childs we don't even know yet

Antibeast: He could speak the truth…

ScienceDude: Traitor

ProtagTime: Hey give clem a break

ScienceDude: Thanks Ash u.u   
  



	24. Blimp-ing madness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash gets a blimp. He's insane.

Legend4Life: Fuck.

PrinceLife: That's my line.

FlareBoss: Sweetheart, you don't claim a word. -_-

PrinceLife: Aww.

MegaSweetheart: Oh shit, it's positive, isn't it?

Legend4Life: Mhm.

ScienceDude: I'm sorry. OnO

IBeASadBean: _Look how he massacred my boy..._

Antibeast: It ain't much of a massacre, we've had a pregnant 19 year old before, we can handle a 25 year old.

Legend4Life: Do you have to explain age for reassurance or are you not smart enough to figure out a different method?

Antibeast: Just stfu.

Legend4Life: Make me.

ArtisticChefBoi: Guys, I'm having a bit of a crisis. You don't have long!

IBeASadBean: Where are you and are you ok?!

ArtisticChefBoi: Lost inhaler, can't breathe!

MegaSweetheart: At home?

ArtisticChefBoi: No, restaurant.

MegaSweetheart: I'll go, it's quicker.

IBeASadBean: And he's just left the Lab.

ScienceDude: Guys, has anyone seen Ash?

WorldChamp38: Yeah. He's here in Ferrum. WITH A FUCKING BLIMP!!!

Legend4Life: **HOW THE FUCK DID HE GET A BLIMP?!?!**

WorldChamp38: Assuming from the logo, I'd say from Hoenn.

Sticks&Stone: Guys, my dad's lost a blimp.

ScienceDude: Just look up a few messages, no scrolling is even needed.

Sticks&Stone: I'm about to kill someone.

KingOfTheKeys: Why did Ash get a blimp in the first place???

ScienceDude: Pierre, it's Ash, he has no reasoning at all.

Legend4Life: You have no reasoning when drunk.

ScienceDude: I said I was sorry.

Legend4Life: At least I didn't have to get mysteriously drugged for it.

TheSinnohQueen: This isn't the time. Katt, get him down from there!

WorldChamp38: I. AM. TRYING!

Jirachi: You're not trying enough.

WorldChamp38: WELL GET UP AND HELP ME THEN!!!

FloraNFauna: I'm coming.

Jirachi: Do I have to---Ow, Flora, AH, YOU'RE STRANGLING ME!

ProtagTime: Wow, nice view.

ScienceDude: Why do you have a blimp and why are you over Ferrum?

Sticks&Stone: Oh, and when you get down, can I just beat the living shit out of you?

ItsFabulousBish: _S T E V E N._

Sticks&Stone: Ok, forget the living part.

WorldChamp38: Blimp crisis sorted.

ProtagTime: Aww, you ruined my fun.

WorldChamp38: I stopped your round of being a bitch.

PrinceLife: Quick question...has anyone seen Melony lately???

LostBoi: Oh, she's just taking a break from chat to relax.

FloraNFauna: I think everything is sorted then.

JustANormalGuy: Guys...the Gym's on fire.

ProtagTime: OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE NORMAN!


	25. ASH I SWEAR  TO ARCEUS-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WHO KEEPS GIVING ASH THINGS THEY SHOULDN'T?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Stuff happens, and Ash steals something from someone in another world.

ProtagTime: I'M FLYING!!!

Antibeast: What the acual FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?

ProtagTime: Skydiving! what else? 

WorldChamp38: WHAT?!

Jirachi: Am I reading this correctly? 

ScienceDude: ASH WTH IS WRONG WITH YOU?! ALCOHOL, HANG GLIDING, BLIMPS, SKYDIVING, WHO AND WHY?!

ProtagTime: Well....It's not my fault. It's May's. 

RibbonPrincess: OH throw ME under the bus now. 

Antibeast: May...tell us the truth. Now. 

RibbonPrincess: Fine. I gave Ash the alcohol, helped him get a blimp, and gave him sky diving tickets. 

ScienceDude: What about the Hang Glider. 

ProtagTime: Oh, I stole that from my friend Kit. Hope he won't miss it!

ContestContender: Oh god...Ash you didnt. Did you really do what I think you did? 

Antibeast: Who's Kit? 

ContestContender: That's a long story, literally. Let's just say he's someone I've known for a long time who isn't a Pokemon Trainer. 

Antibeast: Oh-kay...and Ash stole his hang glider? 

ContestContender: In terms we can all understand, he stole a hang glider from someone in another world, the end. 

ScienceDude: I need a nap. 

ProtagTime: AND I NEED A PARACHUTE!!!!! 

WorldChamp38: That sounds like you have poor planning skills. I'm on my way. 

Antibeast: No kidding. 

Jirachi: Welp this time I'm SURE I'm not getting involved. 

FloraNFauna: Get over here Masterette. You and I and Katt are going to help him. 

Jirachi: No way. ACK-COULD YOU STOP DRAGGING ME BY MY HOOD?! 

NormalGirl4: I'm guessing this phrase fits for what goes on around here. 

Antibeast: And that is? 

NormalGirl4: Shit happens. 


	26. Finally asleep.. and Photo Chaos

WorldChamp38: .. Is he done?

SoftBoiUwU: Sleeping thank Arceus

FloraNFauna: Dammit Ash he'd better be sleeping good and long.

SassyLostChild: Better if forever

ImSmort: Bede that's not nice :c 

Antibeast: … I wanna agree with him.

IBeASadBean: Same

Legend4Life: …. Yeah. Too much hype from Ash.

ScienceDude: >:( 

SoftBoiUwU: >:(

SticksNStones: Don't anger the spouses boys u.u 

Jirachi: Yesh.. remember what happened to Flint.

BurnMeAlive: Stop ;; 

ProtagTime: I live

PrinceLife: Fuck

ProtagTime: dhsjzjzjsjsjwjwjajajjaajakjjzjzkaoaowkwnxnzjiaizjzjsjajajw

Antibeast: ???

SassyLostChild: he broke the keyboard

SoftBoiUwU: More like faceplanted on the keyboard. He's that exhausted.

FloraNFauna: rip

ChatBrotherLance: RAIHAN

ChatBrotherLance: … Can someone please tell me where my brother is? ^_^" I just need to talk.

LostBoi: What did he do Lance? :O 

ChatBrotherLance: He

ChatBrotherLance: He made this photo edit of me. Surrounded by a hundred Cynthias. While our husbands and son are hidden behind the crowd.

ChatBrotherLance: … I'm not posting that here. 

SoftBoiUwU: Looks cursed and I haven't even seen it o.o

SticksNStones: That's.. an unusual yet interesting setting?

ItsFabulousBish: I'd love a hundred Cynthias <3

ChatBrotherLance: I would too. Absolutely… If Raihan didn't title that photo 'Lance's Nightmare' >:c

ItsFabulousBish: GASP

SticksNStones: No how dare

RainDragon: Yoo I'm here - oh shit

ChatBrotherLance: >:(

SticksNStones: >:(

ItsFabulousBish: >:( 

ScienceDude: And we just got off that topic?? 

ScienceDude: Ugh there they go…

RainDragon: My ankles.. Dratinis stop tickling me!

ChatBrotherLance: 30 mins. Sorry bro, I love the picture but a hundred Tias aren't a nightmare u3u Never.   
  



	27. Insert funny title here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Rubs hands together) Spicy stuff.

MegaSweetheart: My entire body hurts.

WorldChamp38: What happened?

MegaSweetheart: I fell down THE FUCKING **STAIRS**!

ChatMumMelony: Language!

KingOfTheKeys: Melony! Are you ok?

ChatMumMelony: I'm fine, dear. How's your daughter?

KingOfTheKeys: Ash is taking care of her.

ScienceDude: WE'RE taking care of her. Ash is not the best with parental duties. She's cried for hours and we've just gotten her to sleep.

IBeASadBean: Oh my lord, your bone's nearly sticking out.

MegaSweetheart: I know, it really hurts!

Legend4Life: I come back from morning sickness to THIS?!

LostBoi: Need a hand, m8?

MegaSweetheart: Yes please.

LostBoi: I wasn't asking you, but sure.

MegaSweetheart: -_-

PrinceLife: GuysIdranktoomuchcoffeeandnowIkeepforgettingaspacekeyexists.CansomeonecomeoverandhelpmeplsIthinkImgoingtopassout.

ImSmort: Oh for goodness sake, Lear, what did we tell you about having so much coffee?

PrinceLife: IdontknowIhaventsleptin20hours.

FlareBoss: Don't worry, Rose. I've got him.

BurnMeAlive: Need a tranq dart?

FlareBoss: No thanks, I have my own.

RainDragon: Is everyone cool now?

ChatBrotherLance: Yeah.

Sticks&Stone: Yeah.

ItsFabulousBish: Yeah.

TheSinnohQueen: No.

RainDragon: Aww, come on.

TheSinnohQueen: Oh, not to you.

BurnMeAlive: We've been over this. _It was an accident. **I said I was sorry. FORGIVE ME ALREADY!**_

TheSinnohQueen: Not to you either.

BurnMeAlive: Oh. Then who are you against?

TheSinnohQueen: The expectee.

Legend4Life: What have I done?!

TheSinnohQueen: YOU TOOK ¥20,000 OUT OF **MY** ACCOUNT!

Legend4Life: I can explain...

TheSinnohQueen: You didn't have to go and steal if you had a good reason!

Legend4Life: ...

KingOfTheKeys: Are you ok, mon ami?

Legend4Life: I've been really struggling since my parents found out. They've essentially disowned me. I needed to get money from somewhere, my PokeMart jobs don't pay enough. I've been staying at Paul's, he knows what happened and he's fine with it. He's getting a new job tomorrow as a hospital receptionist and should be able to help both of us. I'll return as much as I can.

TheSinnohQueen: No, it's fine, keep it. I can always take it out of Katt's account.

WorldChamp38: I'll transfer it later. Tobias, if you needed it, you could've called me instead.

Legend4Life: I know.

JustANormalGuy: Guys---

WorldChamp38: I swear if you've broken something---

JustANormalGuy: Nope. I just won a tournament!

Sticks&Stone: The Hoenn Powers tournament?

JustANormalGuy: Yeah.

WorldChamp38: Good job! Congrats!

FloraNFauna: K A T T.

WorldChamp38: Wtf do YOU want?

FloraNFauna: Look up.

Jirachi: YAAHOOOO!!!

ProtagTime: HEY! MY WINGSUIT!

KingOfTheKeys: I thought you were taking care of August.

ProtagTime: Still asleep. Finally got her to her bed.

WorldChamp38: What did you give her?

FloraNFauna: She's high and drunk.

WorldChamp38: WHAT?!

ProtagTime: At least it's not me this time. It's weird.

Jirachi: P R E T T Y **C O L O U R S !**

FloraNFauna: Ok. GOTCHA!

Jirachi: _Will you marry me?_

FloraNFauna: Yes---wait, OH NO!

WorldChamp38: At least you got her to the ground.

FloraNFauna: NO ONE HEARD ANYTHING.

WorldChamp38: Deal.


	28. What Happened Here?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IDK what happened, randomness occurred

Jirachi: My head hurts, ow...

WorldChamp38: You're in so much trouble!! I can't believe what you did!!

ProtagTime: Ya! You stole my flight suit and went flying? And Btw, we're the same size? 

Jirachi: Oops? And I guess so. 

ScienceDude: This isn't a simple oops, Masterette. You're underage!! 

FloraNFauna: And you asked to marry me!!!!! I had to tackle you to the ground to get you down!!! 

Jirachi: Welp I'm surprised I can still move my thumbs. I can barely move, it hurts so bad! Every breath has a blinding pain attached to it!! I'm not leaving my bed, thank you very much. 

FloraNFauna: At least its keeping you in one place. You're just like Ash!!

Antibeast: That's called Karma, A, and B, Ash, you cant exactly complain. You DID steal a hang glider. 

ProtagTime: Fair Enough. I just am in shock she got drunk and high all at once. Who gave her that stuff anyway? 

RibbonPrincess: It wasn't me this time, I swear. 

WorldChamp38: Well I don't think she found it on her own. 

ScienceDude: I'll start an investigation, ASAP!!! 

15YearsWasted: Wow. At least we know it wasn't me!!!! I'm in Unova.

ScienceDude: Do you think Zinnia is involved? Have you seen her user? 

WeedBrownie: Did somebody call? 

Antibeast: Speak of the devil. 

SoftboyUwU: What is happening? 

WorldChamp38: To catch ya up, Masterette has a hangover, Clemont's trying to figure out who gave her the stuff, and the rest of us are just talking about random shit. 

ScienceDude: I know of the expression, curiousity killed the cat. I think that may have been a part!

Jirachi: Wutever. I'm taking a nap. 

FloraNFauna. Brb. I'm going to tie Masterette to her bed with heavy-duty rope. She can't cause trouble if she can't move!! 

WorldChamp38: You're WHAT?! I have got to get over there and restore order. 

ProtagTime: I'll take some chicken and a number 5!

Antibeast: not that kind of order, dumbass. 


	29. Beesechurger

Bea193: ………. Whoever taught Alli that meme is gonna get it from me.

MarriedGoth: Wasn't me. Ain't Gordie either.

LoverBoulder: Ffs what kinda meme is it?

Legend4Life: Memes? They're not that bad. Let the kid have his fun.

ScienceDude: Not all of them Toby…

BurnMeAlive: Toby 

FloraNFauna: Aw nickname

Legend4Life: Shut

TheSinnohQueen: Still mad at you Flint

BurnMeAlive: :(

LilPureBoi: Chikin Nunget

Antibeast: … The heck

WorldChamp38: Oh! I think I know what that is!

Bea193: hissssss

LoverBoulder: Girl, I wouldn't if I were you. 

LochNessaMonster: Oh Arceus somebody's chosen death.

LostBoi: Got back from McDonalds with Hop and the hatchlings! What did I miss :D 

LilPureBoi: Phucking beesechurger

LostBoi: Holy

RainDragon: …. Hey who put the kid on weed?

Bea193: Allister noooooo

ProtagTime: Oh yay he finally did the McDonalds meme :D

Bea193: You

LoverBoulder: Arceus what have you done

ProtagTime: What?

SoftBoiUwU: I tried to stop him xc

Bea193: Do you wanna have a bad time?

ProtagTime: Um.. No?

ProtagTime: oh no.

LochNessaMonster: rip Ash Ketchum

ScienceDude: H-He's not really getting killed is he? :O

MarriedGoth: No man. Just dunked on.

SoftBoiUwU: meap


	30. Shit happens, deal with it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the title says.

Antibeast: ...

WorldChamp38: What?

Antibeast: I'm getting...

Antibeast: V i b e s.

Jirachi: What kinda...

Jirachi: V i b e s ?

FloraNFauna: No one cares about vibes rn.

Antibeast: Bad vibes. Like something bad is about to happen.

IBeASadBean: It already has happened. I'm in the hospital. Good news, I now hold the record for the shortest recorded coma at 0.4 seconds.

MegaSweetheart: It's still a coma. I was worried.

IBeASadBean: You ALWAYS worry.

MegaSweetheart: That's what big brothers do.

ProtagTime: Guys, does anyone know where Flint is???

UnlimitedPower: Dead.

ArtisticChefBoi: N o .

Snekki: Probably being chased by Cynthia.

TheSinnohQueen: Nope. I'm here.

ColdAsIce: Then where is he?

BurnMeAlive: I'm here...

TheSinnohQueen: Flint, you're covered in scratches! What happened to you?!

BurnMeAlive: Went for a walk to clear my head. You haven't forgiven me for what I do, so I was also trying to figure out if I did anything else wrong for you to resent me for this long. On my way back, I got attacked by some wild Pokemon. One of them was a Scyther and it was inches away from stabbing me in the chest. I ran back and it all hurts...

TheSinnohQueen: Oh, Flint...I don't resent you for that. It was a tranq dart and it was an accident. I've just held it against you for this long because it still hurts where you shot me.

DoctorOrders: Why didn't you see a doctor about it then?!

TheSinnohQueen: Paparazzi was waiting outside. Some of them are such creeps.

DoctorOrders: Makes sense.

BurnMeAlive: So...do you forgive me???

TheSinnohQueen: Of course I do. You're like a little brother to me.

BurnMeAlive: Aww, thanks onii-chan!

TheSinnohQueen: **Never call me onii-chan.**

BurnMeAlive: Eep! Ok!

Legend4Life: Glad that's over.

IBeASadBean: Hey Tobes.

ProtagTime: First Toby, then Tobes?

IBeASadBean: Oh, no, I always nicknamed him Tobes.

Legend4Life: Yeah, and I always nicknamed him Al.

ColdAsIce: Al?! That's an old folk name! LMAO!

UltimateDad: Did...did you say LMAO?

ColdAsIce: I know it means "laughing my ass off" hence why I said it!

LilPureBoi: How is it that possible?

UltimateDad: O.O

ColdAsIce: O.O

Bea193: What's up, Alli?

LilPureBoi: I-Is it possible to laugh your ass off?

ChatMumMelony: _LE GASP_

ColdAsIce: Uh oh...

Bea193: _**PRYCE!!!**_

UltimateDad: Bea! Be gentle! He may look tough, but his pain tolerance is low!

ColdAsIce: OW! OW! OW! STOP IT!

Bea193: Shut up!

ColdAsIce: _OW! MY ARM!_

WorldChamp38: Well that just happened.


	31. Who's missing?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Read the title, here we go!!!!

ProtagTime: I'm holding a grudge. 

WorldChamp38: That's uh, nice. Against who? 

Antibeast: What happened NOW?! 

ProtagTime: Masterette. 

Doc.B: Don't you have something better to do with your time? 

ProtagTime: Well, no. I'm still mad she stole my flight suit. Where is she even? 

RibbonPrincess: I'm so happy!!! 

Antibeast: Wut happened to U? 

RibbonPrincess: Grand Festival!!! EEEEEEEE!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!! 

Doc.B: I need a new eardrum thanks. 

WorldChamp38: Well nothing too weird has happened. But where is Masterette? 

FloraNFauna: I didn't do it. 

WorldChamp38: What. Did. You. Do? 

ProtagTime: Is someone dead? 

KingOfTheKeys: Says the one who has died nearly what, a zillion times now? 

NormalGirl4: Flora??? 

Antibeast: I Yi Yi. I need a Vacation. #woeisme

WorldChamp38: I know Masterette isn't obligated to come on here all the time, I'm still curious of where she is. 

FloraNFauna: I don't get it. She somehow untied herself from her bed, so Idk where she could be. 

ContestContender: She has to appear eventually. Oh, and btw, WHO WAS SETTING OFF FIREWORKS AT 2AM?!?!?!

ProtagTime: Maybe I did? 

Antibeast: You people are impossible. 


	32. Sad Ash Hours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains slight spoilers to the latest Journeys ep ^^

ProtagTime: Our Pokemon are the greatest partners ever. Always divide your time between them fairly. Everyone counts.

IBeASadBean: Words of wisdom from Ash? That's new..

SoftBoiUwU: Something wrong Ash?

Legend4Life: For once he's not high thank arceus.

TheSinnohQueen: Hush Tobias, this is serious. 

ProtagTime: … Pikachu ran away. I almost lost him.

Antibeast: Shut up

AdorableDwagon: No seriously?? But you were so close! :O 

FloraNFauna: Relax readers pikachu went home lol

WorldChamp38: No 4th wall breaks Flora! 

ScienceDude: I am tempted to ask why? 

ProtagTime: It was my fault.

ProtagTime: I was focusing on my Riolu so much I didn't pay much attention to Pikachu… 

ProtagTime: Yeah he's back in my arms now and I'm never doing the same thing again. But… I feel terrible. I hurt my best friend.

SoftBoiUwU: Oh Ash. It's okay. I mean it's in the past. Move on :( 

ProtagTime: I can't.. It feels like only yesterday.

Antibeast: Wow sad Ash hours.

ScienceDude: I'm coming Ash. 

SoftBoiUwU: :'(((( 

ChatMumMelony: What's going on? Why do I sense one of my chat babies in sadness? 

MegaSweetheart: Aw chat babies. 

ChatMumMelony: Quiet Augustine they're my kids as well as yours.

UltimateDad: Sawyer, Clemont. Everything alright over there?

SoftBoiUwU: we're giving him hugs rn.

ChatMumMelony: *mother senses tingling* 

LoverBoulder: Mum dw I'm sure they got it under control. 

ScienceDude: Yes fear not Ms Melony ^^ We got this.

ChatMumMelony: Okay then. I'll have some cookies made for him <3 

MegaSweetheart: Delia getting extra maman support~


	33. Sad Hours To Mad Hours To Glad Hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sad vibes to mad vibes and then shortly over to glad vibes. Oh, and Piers finally asked to be in the Trans Army.

IBeASadBean: Is Ash ok now?

ProtagTime: I feel much better after lots of cuddles. ^v^

ScienceDude: And Sawyer's username is very true in this scenario.

SoftBoyUwU: Yes. I am very soft.

ProtagTime: Yeah, even the bits that are meant to hurt you, like the elbows. On the other hand, we have Katt's elbow knives.

WorldChamp38: **What?**

MegaSweetheart: Too boney. Seriously Katt, what are your bones made of?

WorldChamp38: They're made of bone.

KingOfTheKeys: _As if that wasn't obvious enough already._

WorldChamp38: SHUT IT.

ChatMumMelony: Are you all ok, darlings?

WorldChamp38: We're fine.

ColdAsIce: Mostly. I'm in a cast, thanks to little miss Hulk over there.

Bea193: Due to the strength, I'll take it as a compliment.

UltimateDad: Aww, my poor snowball. Do you need anything?

ColdAsIce: No, I'm fine...

MegaSweetheart: One more like that and you may want life insurance, you'll crumble like soggy paper.

UltimateDad: _**Augustine Charlotte Sycamore, you better take that fucking comment back right now or I'll call your brother to beat the shit out of you.**_

MegaSweetheart: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, please don't!

ColdAsIce: Kabu, it's fine, he was just joking.

UltimateDad: Joking? JOKING?! I'm not in the mood for jokes. One of my Pokemon is in a life threatening state, I don't need this right now, especially a joke like that!

ChatMumMelony: Kabu---

UltimateDad: Shut up. I'm leaving.

**UltimateDad has left the chat.**

Legend4Life: Gee, thanks Augustine, you ruined the poor man.

MegaSweetheart: I didn't know it would be received so badly...I'm sorry...

TheSinnohQueen: It's fine. On a lighter note...C h a r l o t t e.

LostBoi: I forgot about your middle name!

FlareBoss: You NEVER told me your middle name.

FloraNFauna: PFFT. That's hilarious!

MegaSweetheart: Honestly...it's a little funny looking at it. If this was a decade ago, I would've stormed out in a blaze of fury, I hated it. I never bothered to get it changed. To be fair, it kinda fits my style.

LostBoi: Your clothing style hasn't changed much when looking at photos of you. XD

MegaSweetheart: Yeah.

**Legend4Life has left the chat.**

ProtagTime: Where's HE going?

MarriedGoth: Got added to the Trans Army chat after requesting privately. He's getting a checkup from the trans friendly hospital in Sinnoh. Luckily, he lives right nearby.

SassyLostChild: Trans Army to Agent 6, copy that.

MarriedGoth: Thanks, Bede.

LostBoi: Aww, I wanted to do the initiation!

SassyLostChild: Oops. Sorry.

MegaSweetheart: Welcome, officially, to the Trans Army. ^v^

MarriedGoth: Thank you!

Jirachi: That was a lot of vibes at once.


	34. We just Vibin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we go again....

ProtagTime: If Our LOOOOVVVEEEE is Tragety why are You my Clarity.....

Antibeast: What the actual fuck are you doing?

ProtagTime: Singing! DUH!!! 

PapaKukui: Ash...Ash...just stop. You're singing Clarity. That's a problem. 

WorldChamp38: Amongst OTHER problems you've caused. 

Jirachi: I have an idea...:-) 

ProtagTime: HEY! GET BACK HERE WITH MY MICROPHONE!!!

Antibeast:He had a microphone? Arceus, save us all now... 

ProtagTime: Highlight HAD. Masterette just came through riding a Decidueye and took it!! 

FloraNFauna: Nice going. I think Ash is tone deaf. he can't sing, so i doubt he can dance.

NormalGirl4: Well I'm playing MarioKart 8 Deluxe. Anyone else wanna join!!!

Misty404: Ooh! I'm OMW

WorldChamp38: Sounds like fun

ProtagTime: I want my Mic back!! Charizard let's go!!!

Doc.B: O-O I'm seeing things.. 

Bea193: Y? 

Doc.B: Ash is chasing Masterette around trying to use flamethrower on that Decidueye of hers but it's too fast. 

15YearsWasted: Someone really should stop him. 

ProtagTime: Get...back...here! 

Jirachi: Welp I just accidentally dropped it in the ocean

Doc.B: Thx, Masterette

WorldChamp38: I'm gonna go check Ash's house for any more "Questionable items" 

FloraNFauna: I'll join. 

Jirachi: And I'll keep him distracted!! 

Antibeast: Awesome. 


	35. When August Hits

IBeASadBean: Oh no it's August.

15YearsWasted: Ooh boi xD

ArtisticChefBoi: Mon dieu

ProtagTime: What's wrong with August?

WorldChamp38: Omfg imma hide in the locker.

SoftBoiUwU: What's happening??

ArtisticChefBoi: … What is the professor's first name.

ProtagTime: Augustine? 

IBeASadBean: Bingo

FloraNFauna: And what's that got to do with… Oh

FloraNFauna: August

ChatMumMelony: … Why do I hear someone screeching Alouette? 

KingOfTheKeys: August has begun.

MegaSweetheart: :DDDDDDD

FlareBoss: Augustine hours have just begun. Please arm your tranquilizers. 

BurnMeAlive: Gotcha.

IBeASadBean: Look away Mairin look away

15YearsWasted: What's he doing now??

MegaSweetheart: Someone toss me a Sycamoriteeee~ I am ready to mega evolveee!

FlareBoss: *facepalm*

PrinceLife: Look at all these empty Vodka bottles.

ProtagTime: .. Damn and I thought I was the worse high.

bluehair-dontcare: Uh, you are.

FlareBoss: Oui.

ProtagTime: Aw :( 


	36. You Booze You Lose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stuff. Idk, I'm running out of creative descriptions.

ProtagTime: ... _oh no._

ScienceDude: What's up, Ash?

ProtagTime: What about our daughter, August???

KingOfTheKeys: _**MON DIEU!!!**_

SoftBoyUwU: Guys! She's fine! The hungover guy on the other hand...

MegaSweetheart: My head is pounding...

IBeASadBean: He hasn't moved an inch, he's THAT hung over.

TechnicalHeart: WTF did I just walk into?

DoctorOrders: Oh, Augustine...why did you drink so much???

MegaSweetheart: I think I just had a moment of realisation, since I forgot August had begun and just downed a whole bottle. I ended up so drunk, I had two more...

DoctorOrders: **I'M SURPRISED YOU'RE NOT DEAD!!!**

ChatMumMelony: Oh dear...how bad is it really?

DoctorOrders: It's bad enough having an entire bottle to yourself. 3 is horrendous. Come on, I'm taking you to work for dialysis.

MegaSweetheart: Aww... :(

IBeASadBean: It's for your own good, dumbass.

DoctorOrders: _ALAIN._

IBeASadBean: Sorry. >m<

WorldChamp38: Everything good now?

FloraNFauna: Looks like it, yeah.

FlareBoss: I'm coming.

PrinceLife: ÓnÒ

FlareBoss: You and Leah can come too, of course.

PrinceLife: ÒvÓ

FlareBoss: You're not getting any Doritos.

PrinceLife: ÒnÓ

FlareBoss: Fine...I can never resist you...have the Doritos.

PrinceLife: ÓvÒ

WorldChamp38: Guys...I don't think that locker was empty...I'm seeing colourful swirls...

Jirachi: THIS ISN'T GOOD!

FloraNFauna: THIS ISN'T GOOD AT ALL! **KATT IS HIGH!**

ChaoticGay: WHAT DID I MISS?! WHAT DID I---oh.

WorldChamp38: _According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly._

ChatBrotherLance: NOT THE BEE MOVIE RECITAL, _NOT THE BEE MOVIE RECITAL, **NOT THE BEE MOVIE RECITAL!!!**_

WorldChamp38: _It's wings are too small to lift it's fat, little body off the ground._

BurnMeAlive: ON MY WAY!!!

WorldChamp38: _The bee, of course, flies anyway, because bees don't care what humans think is impossible..._

Jirachi: Just in time. Thanks Flint.

FloraNFauna: Oh wow, look where it landed, just like when you hit Cyn---

BurnMeAlive: _Don't, I have PTSD from that day..._

ArtisticChefBoi: Augustine, you ok?

DoctorOrders: He's asleep. He looks so peaceful... ^v^

PrinceLife: ÓnÒ

FlareBoss: What's up?

PrinceLife: No Doritos...

FlareBoss: Aww, nevermind. You can have Doritos when we get back.

PrinceLife: Tangy cheese?

FlareBoss: Always.

PrinceLife: Yay!

Jirachi: A lot of shit has happened. The others will be so confused. XD


	37. Why Can't You All Just Behave Yourselves!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idk wut to say anymore. Keep moving down!!!!
> 
> *Oh, and feel free to put Serena with anyone outside of the Pokemon World you want*

ProtagTime: YAHOO!!! 

Antibeast: I swear if you're drunk, high, on a stolen hang glider, causing trouble...damn it, BEING YOURSELF, I'm gonna off some heads

PrtagTime: Meanie!! 0-0

NormalGirl4: Relax. He only said yahoo. Nothing else yet for us to scream at him for. Yet. 

RibbonPrincess: HOLY SHIT WHO THE FRICK GAVE ASH A CAR?! 

SoftBoyUwU: I TOLD him not to take my Jeep for a joyride but NO!! He just HAD to!!!!

Antibeast: HE'S DRIVING? CALL THE AUTHORITES!!! 

Sciencedude: I yi yi...That boy's lucky I love him. Cuz if not, I may have killed him by now. 

WorldChamp38: Ash is a road hazard to himself and to everyone here!! 

BurnMeAlive: Uhhh...what are we gonna do about it? 

ProtagTime: Joyriding is the best! Thank Chu Sawyer!!!! 

_truekalosqueen_: What did I ever see in that boy? Good thing I have a new crush!! 

ContestContender: Serena...your not talking about.....? 

Jirachi: No way Serena..just stop this right here and now. Never Gonna Happen!

FloraNFauna: Who? Wait, what?! 

_truekalosqueen_: Maybe. Maybe not. 

Antibeast: Who are you guys TALKING about? 

ContestContender: I'm gonna beat the snot out of Ash for his past mistakes. World Jumping. 

ProtagTime: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, QUIT RIDING MY ASS ABOUT THE HANG GLIDER!!! IT'S OVER AND I'M TIRED OF IT!! 

SoftBoyUwU: I wanna hug him so tight when he gets home, Clemont's at the gym so much he may as well marry _it._

Sciencedude: Cut me an fricken break. I'm a gym leader, remember? 

smolbean.but.mean: Me need ice cream. 

RibbonPrincess: Awww!!

WorldChamp38: Wut? 

RibbonPrincess: Max just left to get Bonnie ice cream. How adorable is that? 

Antibeast: Meh. 

Jirachi: Your brain is meh when it comes to love

KingOfTheKeys: I Yi Yi. Moi J'adore le glass chocolat!! 

FloraNFauna: Translate? 

Jirachi: He says he loves chocolate ice cream

WorldChamp38: you speak French? 

Jirachi: A bit. Just a bit. 

ProtagTime: SHIT! I just got pulled over!!

SoftBoyUwU: aaaaaaaannnnddd he left his license on the table. Why did I see this coming? 


	38. Let Piers Eat 20k

MarriedGoth: I've been havin a thing for melons lately.

ProtagTime: What kind of melons?

SoftBoiUwU: Ash nooo

LoverBoulder: Dirty kid. He means the fruit.

ChatMumMelony: Keep eating melons dear, they have lots of vitamins~

MarriedGoth: Got it mum

FloraNFauna: Piers you might as well name your kid Melon xD

MarriedGoth: Yes

FloraNFauna: o.o

WorldChamp: Woo wtg Flora

KingOfTheKeys: Wait.. No offense but I have concerns. Piers you're as skinny as a twig… How?

ScienceDude: Tobias is quite thin too..

Legend4Life: Not like the goth??

BurnMeAlive: Yeah Tob's got flesh.

LoverBoulder: Are you saying my husband ain't meat? >:(

MarriedGoth: Shite y'all making me insecure. Not my fault I can't gain weight.

ProtagTime: Let Piers Eat 20k

PrinceLife: You need it too. For the baby.

MarriedGoth: I'm trying for fuck's sake. Why do you think I watch bloody food porn?

ChatMumMelony: Language! Also there's children here!

MarriedGoth: Aye

smolbean.but.mean: What's food porn? 

ProtagTime: Oh no

ScienceDude: Nooooooo


	39. Kicking + Singing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pregnancy kicks and drunken singing. Another day at the chat office.

UltimateDad: o.o

ChatMumMelony: I see what you mean.

Snekki: Oh no.

JustANormalGuy: _What is happening? It's 5am._

UltimateDad: I have a drunk fiance.

MegaSweetheart: OH, HIIIII~~~.

IBeASadBean: Add another to the drunk party.

DoctorOrders: Ffs, Alain, I told you SPECIFICALLY to lock the liquor cabinet!

IBeASadBean: I was afraid of losing the key and not getting any rum.

ArtisticChefBoi: I feel horrid...

DoctorOrders: What's up?

IBeASadBean: Don't say you're pregnant.

ArtisticChefBoi: No. Diarrhoea.

ArtsyMulti: We've gone through two cans of Febreze!

Jirachi: Oh, I remember setting Flora on fire with one of those and a box of matches!

FloraNFauna: _**Don't remind me.**_

Legend4Life: AHH! GUYS, I HAVE GOOD NEWS!

MarriedGoth: Baby kicks?

Legend4Life: HOW DID YOU GUESS?!

MarriedGoth: You sent me a video. -_-

Legend4Life: Oh yeah.

KingOfTheKeys: How are you two doing?

MarriedGoth: Fine.

Legend4Life: Fine.

ColdAsIce: _There is...a house...in Unova..._

UltimateDad: Uh oh.

ColdAsIce: _THEY CALL THE RISING SUN!_

ColdAsIce: _AND IT'S BEEN...the ruins of many a poor boy._

ColdAsIce: _And Arceus, I know, I'm one._

Snekki: Someone call Flint and get the tranqs here.

ArtisticChefBoi: He's on, what he calls, a fireball trip. Why aren't you there?

UltimateDad: I have to keep an eye on Pryce and make sure he doesn't pull a Norman trick.

JustANormalGuy: Hey, stfu, I've been a bit clumsy lately.

ChatMumMelony: Kabu, a different song has started, what's going to happen?

UltimateDad: OH NO.

WorldChamp38: Wait, what's happening?

UltimateDad: There is a reason Pryce chose ColdAsIce as his username...that song just came on, brace yourselves!!!

ColdAsIce: _**YOU'RE AS COLD AS ICE!!!**_

ColdAsIce: _**YOU'RE WILLING TO SACRIFICE OUR LOVE!!!**_

Legend4Life: o.o

KingOfTheKeys: I CAN HEAR HIM FROM THE SHOWCASE STADIUM, WHAT THE FUCK?!?!

Jirachi: _Ahh._

ColdAsIce: _**YOU NEVER TAKE ADVICE!!!**_

ColdAsIce: _**BUT SOMEDAY YOU'LL PAY THE PRICE, I KNOW!!!**_

ColdAsIce: **I've seen it before, it happens all the time. Closing the door, you leave the world behind. You're digging for gold, yet throwing away. A fortune in feelings _BUT SOMEDAY YOU'LL PAY!!!_**

WorldChamp38: CHRIST, HOW POWERFUL ARE HIS LUNGS?!

Snekki: I think his mum's turning in her grave...

FloraNFauna: I'll be turning in MY grave if he doesn't shut up.

Jirachi: Let's just wait until he shuts up.


	40. Butter On The Umbrella

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IDK what to say. Keep scolling!!

KingOfTheKeys: WHO STOLE MY DAMN UMBRELLA?! MASTERETTE!? ASH!?

Jirachi: I just woke up, er, was woken up cuz its **3 fricken AM here!!**

ProtagTime: Yea Yea. I stole the Umbrella. To put butter on it. 

WorldChamp38: I think I need glasses. WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY!? 

ScienceDude: Ash. Wud it kill U to stay in bed with Sawyer and I for 8 hours without causing problems?! 

FloraNFauna: WhO wOkE mE Up?! 

Jirachi: SHITSHITSHITTYSHITSHITMCSHITTYPANTS I'M GETTING OUTTA HERE 'FORE IT GETS UGLY!!!

SoftBoyUwU: Why would it get ugly? 

WorldChamp38: Flora gets a little...uh....what's the word? 

Jirachi: Murderous? 

WorldChamp38: Yes. A little murderous when missing part of the 8 hour sleep block. 

FloraNFauna: PIERRE!! YOU BETTER START RUNNING!! I HAVE A FLAMING CHAINSAW WITH YOUR NECK ON IT!!!! 

ProtagTime: Ack. No wonder Masterette took off

ContestContender: says the one buttering a fricken umbrella!!!! 

Antibeast: Why did I expect this to happen? 

Smokbean.but.mean: IDFK. Max is reading over my shoulder and nearly just peed himself laughing. 

Ribbon princess: MAX!! GET OUTTA HERE IF YOU WANNA LIVE!!!

ProtagTime: I've decided......OW! 

WorldChamp38: what? 

ProtagTime: Masterette just flew through the window and hip checked me into a closet and locked it from the outside!!! 

Jirachi: Can't cause trouble if ya can't leave!

FloraNFauna: don't tell her she's next on my ready-to-send-to-another-world list

Doc.B: Didn't know you had one.

WorldChamp38: I think I need to restore order again

Antibeast: Timeout. It's 3am and Ash is in a closet, Flora is after M.Pierre with a flaming chainsaw, and Masterette IDFK what she's doing!!!! 

CheetoPuff:Help me!!

SoftBoyUWU: With what?

CheetoPuff: I'm drunk

WorldChamp38: OH C'MON!!! NOT YOU TOO!!!! I'm in a world of oddballs at this point.


	41. Moody Ash is Moody

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains spoilers to the latest Journeys episode.

ScienceDude: @Bea193 Uh hey, I can't help but wonder. Did something happen during your match with Ash? Cause he's been training hard and having an emotional rollercoaster for some reason.

ProtagTime: RAWR

SoftBoiUwU: Ash calm down.

Bea193: We had a battle. I came out victorious. Meanwhile, Ash, I'll be waiting for our rematch. Until then, train harder. 

Antibeast: Somebody's sore.

IBeASadBean: Mood

ProtagTime: *whimper* Sawyer I need a hug.

SoftBoiUwU: Gotcha 

LostBoi: Aw chin up Ash! It's not the end of the world :) Like Bea said, she's waiting. One loss doesn't define you.

FloraNFauna: Clemont aren't you going to give your boy a hug?

ScienceDude: I'm at the gym. 

WorldChamp38: F-Flora u good now?

FloraNFauna: Yep.

Jirachi: *relief noises* 

MarriedGoth: God and I thought I'm having the worst.

Legend4Life: Same Piers. Not surprised. Ash and loss? No chemistry.

ProtagTime: hissssss

SoftBoiUwU: Tobias >:c Clem control your wife

Legend4Life: How dare

ScienceDude: Toby give Ash a break he's a state right now ^^"

Legend4Life: ... Only for you Clemont.

BurnMeAlive: Woah did Tobias just submit to Clemont? Congrats on the dom dude :D

Legend4Life: Quiet fool.


	42. Those Monday Moods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (idk what else to put)

Legend4Life: :(

ScienceDude: What's wrong?

Legend4Life: Help me look, will you?

ProtagTime: Look for what?

SoftBoyUwU: Oh no, what have you lost?

IBeASadBean: I think I know what it is. Hey Tobes, lost your binder?

Legend4Life: Yeah, I took it off last night and when I woke up, it was gone.

LostBoi: Lost binder, huh? What if you can't find it?

Legend4Life: Expect me to become a nervous wreck. I can barely go anywhere without it, even with my cloak on. Dysphoria always lingers without it. I need it.

ScienceDude: What colour is it?

ProtagTime: You don't know?

ScienceDude: No.

IBeASadBean: It's black. It looks like a sports bra and a tank top merged.

ScienceDude: How do YOU know?!

Legend4Life: He's one of the only people I trust with it.

ScienceDude: You don't trust me?

Legend4Life: ...not entirely. You're really sweet, but I don't feel comfortable showing you...

ScienceDude: Fine.

MegaSweetheart: Ahh, lost binder. Remember when I was binding, Alain?

IBeASadBean: It was two decades ago, but yeah.

ProtagTime: Damn, Alain's a boomer. XD

IBeASadBean: I AM 28! THAT IS NOT BOOMER AGE!

MegaSweetheart: Besides, I'm older. Only 5 years, but still.

Legend4Life: Found it! It was stuck between my wardrobe and bin. Idk how it go there.

Bea193: _I swear to every legendary out there, I'm gonna snap his neck._

LostBoi: Whoa, Bea, what's up?

Bea193: _**Koga better run.**_

ProtagTime: Where even is Koga?

Snekki: Looks like someone called for some ninjaaaaaohshit.

Bea193: YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ALLISTER!

Snekki: FFS, it was an accident!!!

Legend4Life: What even happened???

LilPureBoi: H-he hit me...

JustANormalGuy: >:(

Snekki: I can explain. I was having a training session with Bea and she kept yelling over me. Well, I use a lot of motion when I get mad, swung my arm to my side and hit Allister in the face with no knowledge of him being right there. I hit him so hard, his nose is broken...

JustANormalGuy: ...did you at least apologise?

Snekki: Of course I did, but Bea won't forgive me.

Legend4Life: Bea.

ProtagTime: Bea.

LostBoi: Bea.

MegaSweetheart: Bea.

ScienceDude: Bea.

SoftBoyUwU: Bea.

IBeASadBean: Bea.

Bea193: W H A T ?

LilPureBoi: I-It was an accident, forgive him.

Bea193: But he hurt you.

LilPureBoi: _**I said forgive him.**_

IBeASadBean: o.o

Bea193: Ok...Koga, I forgive you. Happy now?

LilPureBoi: >:(

Bea193: Sorry...

LilPureBoi: :)

Snekki: Now that is done...where the hell are Katt, Masterette and Flora? I haven't seen any of them in hours.

MegaSweetheart: **Oh no. Look.**

ProtagTime: GUYS, GET THE FUCK OUT OF THAT HELICOPTER!

IBeASadBean: ARE THOSE IRONING BOARDS?!

Legend4Life: WHAT ARE THEY DOING?!?!

WorldChamp38: Hey guys, who wants to do some cloud surfing?!

Jirachi: It's all safe!

FloraNFauna: Come on!

Snekki: I think they're high.

ProtagTime: Yeah! There's joints in their basement!

MegaSweetheart: Why are you there?

ProtagTime: There's such a thing as technology.

Legend4Life: Nevermind that, LET'S HURRY UP, THEY'VE STARTED!

JustANormalGuy: **GUYS, NOOOOO!**


	43. Not Responsible for the Hug fest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ummmm...I like cinnimon rolls. keep scrolling, idk wut to put here

ProtagTime: Yay!

Sciencedude: What did you do?! 

ProtagTime: Nothing! It's national Hug day!! 

WorldChamp38: It's what? 

Jirachi: Well I don't want to-OOF!! 

FloraNFauna: What just happened? 

Jirachi: ASH STOP HUGGING ME, YOU'RE CRUSHING ME!!! 

WorldChamp38: Why was I expecting something like this? ACK! CILAN! WTF ARE YOU DOING!! 

Bowtieman: Hugging you, duh! 

Jirachi: Ash. Let. Go. Or. Else. 

ProtagTime: No thanks!

RibbonPrincess: Well I hugged Flora. Like a normal person. 

Jirachi: You get one more warning. LET. GO. 

Antibeast: I have a feeling this isn't gonna end well... 

Jirachi: Ultra Ultimate Turbo Spin! 

ProtagTime: What is- OWW!!

WorldChamp38: What in the world happened NOW!? WHY ARE YOU TWO SO CHAOTIC!? 

ProtagTime: Well...I didn't listen, and she just spun around at like, a zillion miles an hour and punched me in the stomach, sending me flying. 

Antibeast: Well Ash, you technicallhy deserved it. She DID say let go. Oh, and I probably should've said earlier, Masterette doesn't enjoy her ribs getting crushed. 

FloraNFauna: hey! Who took all the joints out of the basement!? 

KingOfTheKeys: Totally wasn't me. 

FloraNFauna: Pierre, start running. 

KingOfTheKeys: Uh oh. Why? 

FloraNFauna: BECAUSE YOUR DEAD YOU OVERGROWN WATER CLOSET!!! 

WorldChamp38: A WHAT?! 

Jirachi: I don't even WANT to know. 

ProtagTime: I'm surprised I can still breathe. 

Jirachi: I could've gone a LOT harder. 

NormalGirl4: Why can't everyone just get along?! 

WorldChamp38: Good question. Let me know when you find the answer. Because I have no clue. 

ContestContender: Question. 

ProtagTime: Yes? 

ContestContender: WHO THE FRICK BROKE INTO MY HOUSE AND STOLE ALL THE FROZEN CINNIMON ROLLS?! 

ProtagTime: Oopsie... 

ContestContender: Hey Flora, can I borrow your chainsaw? Kinda need it. TO CUT A CERTAIN ASH INTO PIECES!!! 

WorldChamp38: I know for sure I need to restore order, again. I guess the last order is out of stock. 


	44. Dirty Tag

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I'm dragging #pokemonmastersex here too deal with it xD

Protagtime: Hey guys what's this about pokemon masters and sex? 

WorldChamp38: Did Ash just

IBeASadBean: Ash saying the s word I need bleach.

FloraNFauna: CURSED

AdorableDwagon: It's true actually ^^ That does exist! It's the tag for Lear's 3v3 game

SassyLostChild: Don't tell me it reached you guys too... My older brother's losing it already. 

Antibeast: I'm glad I'm not in the game yet. 

WeedBrownie: Eat your words Gladion. You haven't seen yourself and Silvally in the Dream Team builder. Oh, and your mom and sister are in too.

Antibeast: fjsjJjaajajajau NO

ProtagTime: Uh hello, the tag. Is it seriously pokemonmastersex?

PrinceLife: #PokemonMastersEX

SoftBoiUwU: Oh look there's a tiny Red on the end :D

PrinceLife: finally some green-minded appreciation.

FloraNFauna: Ironic princey. Sawyer's literally a greenhead so xD

ProtagTime: Veggie :3

SoftBoiUwU: Am vegetable


	45. Sad Chef Sparks Gaydar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One particular chat member hasn't had the greatest day. Now an incident has resurfaced.

PrinceLife: This whole tag situation is sending me into a crisis...

Legend4Life: It could be worse, there could be R34 stuff on the tag.

KingOfTheKeys: _**There is. I checked.**_

WorldChamp38: Why were you looking at the tag?

KingOfTheKeys: I want to be in the PML! I check everything related to it!

PrinceLife: Ohh, so it was YOU who sent that request email! Thanks for letting me know, I'll try and get you here.

KingOfTheKeys: Merci, Lear!

ArtisticChefBoi: _I'm having a horrible day..._

IBeASadBean: University email about your lack of homework?

ArtisticChefBoi: Well, that's not the main problem, but I did get one.

MegaSweetheart: What's wrong?

ArtisticChefBoi: To start off with, I was at the gymnasium earlier and got harrassed by some of the other guys there since my leotard is quite short. Then, my sister gets hospitalised due to dehydration on set. Finally, I got harrassed AGAIN by a group of guys on the way past one of the tables. I was checking to see how everyone was enjoying their meals and got a slap on my behind. I just need something to cheer me up...

IBeASadBean: Aww, Siebold...want a game of Fall Guys later?

ArtisticChefBoi: I'd love that, thanks Alain.

IBeASadBean: Anything for my best buddy. ;)

ArtisticChefBoi: Oh my! ^v^

DoctorOrders: I SMELL GAY.

UltimateDad: Even from Galar, I can sense it, and I'm bi.

Jirachi: _G A Y D A R P A R T Y !_

FloraNFauna: Plz don't do a gaydar party again.

Legend4Life: Again? What happened last time?

FloraNFauna: Oh, me and Masterette were drunk, Katt wasn't around, so we invited everyone we could think of at the time.

Jirachi: Don't forget the hired dancers!

FloraNFauna: _I want to forget those dancers..._

ArtisticChefBoi: Shut the fuck up, the feelings are mutual.

IBeASadBean: Friendship feelings. Sure, we're both gay, but that does not mean we love each other sexually.

PrinceLife: Then explain what happened during spring term last year in the 2nd floor bathroom.

ArtisticChefBoi: o///o

IBeASadBean: o///o

MegaSweetheart: So that's why I found an empty packet in your bag.

WorldChamp38: _OH._

LoverBoulder: You can say it by name, you know. There's nothing wrong with condoms.

MegaSweetheart: It was an EMPTY packet. _The actual condom was used._

IBeASadBean: I can explain. We were both having a really bad day and one thing lead to another. We were lucky it was only Lear who found us just afterwards.

StabbyStabby: Oh, I think I heard about that. Apparently, a Junior gossiped to a Senior, but no one could confirm.

ProtagTime: You could say they were having... _Pokemon Master S---_

PrinceLife: DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE!

WorldChamp38: _Ash, no._

IBeASadBean: At the very least, it cheered us up.

ArtisticChefBoi: Come on, let's get onto Fall Guys.

**ArtisticChefBoi and IBeASadBean have left the chat.**

MegaSweetheart: What has happened here today?

Legend4Life: Just another day at the chat office.


	46. Pringles in the Sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idk how anything happened, I swear!

ProtagTime: I'm gonna die! 

WorldChamp38: For what, the seventh time? 

ProtagTime: Very hilarious, but help me! 

Antibeast: What did Masterette do NOW!? 

Bowtieman: bold of you to assume she did it. 

Antibeast: Okay, I'm giving someone, ANYONE three seconds to explain before I start offing heads

ContestContende: Pringles in the sky. 

Antibeast: WTF are U talking about!? 

ContestContender: Ash was eating Pringles, while somehow floating in the air, idk. Don't shoot the messenger. 

smolbean.but.mean: Ash needs to take a damn CHILL pill once in a while!! 

FloraNFauna: KATT!! WE HAVE AN ISSUE!! 

WorldChamp38: WTF do YOU want!? 

FloraNFauna: SOMEONE ate all the cupcakes in the house!!

Legend4Life: it was me. 

WorldChamp38: Really? 

Legend4Life: No, I just wanted to see your reaction. 

WorldChamp38: so who _did?_

Antibeast: Signs point to Masterette. 

Jirachi: I DIDN'T DO IT! 

ProtagTime: Yeah...I broke into your house and took 'em. 

WorlChamp38: Ash...I'm nt surprised, but get TF outta my house next time! 

KingOfTheKeys: Ice cream chillin' chillin' ice cream chillin'.... 

Antibeast: YOU LISTENED TO BLACKPINK AND SELENA GOMEZ?! 

KingOfTheKeys: Yea....

Jirachi: #Exposed. 

FloraNFauna:#Need to get things less nuts round here. 

WorldChamp38: I need a nap. 


	47. Big Brothers and Alcohol

ProtagTime: I'm crying.. I have a little brother 

ProtagTime: [LeiKukui.png]

FloraNFauna: Wait the baby's born already?? Eeep! <3 

PapaKukui: Am Papa yeah :') 

MamaKukui: Two boys <3 

MarriedGoth: Daaamn.. I need my bairn out already. 

Legend4Life: Idk what 'bairn' is but this bump's wearing me out already. I look bloated.

IBeASadBean: Tobias it's only been a month?? 

BurnMeAlive: That's a beer belly. 

Legend4Life: Flint shhhhh

MamaKukui: *gasp* 

ChatMumMelony: !!!!!

ScienceDude: xjdjsjsj Tobias noooo 

Legend4Life: It was only one bottle... 

KingOfTheKeys: Still alcohol. 

Legend4Life: I don't see any of you calling Ash out for drinking a whole cabinet of VODKA. All I had was tequila..

ProtagTime: At least I'm not preggo - 3 - 

SoftBoiUwU: Pasta sauce? 

ProtagTime: Yeeeeah 

Legend4Life: ........

UnlimitedPower: Uh oh. Toby's doing that face.

BurnMeAlive: What face?

Legend4Life: Anyone up for some #LearBannedThisHashtagSoICannotSayIt?

BurnMeAlive: Oooooh

MarriedGoth: ... Is that a good idea? 

KingOfTheKeys: You're still far. It's fine Piers.

Legend4Life: fjdjdjzjzjjs

RainDragon: Dude. Just say #PokemonMasterSex we all know what it is. Besides the kiddoes are gone.

Legend4Life: But Lear's not.

PrinceLife: Hissssssss

RainDragon: Shoot.


	48. More Alcohol + Teleportation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teleportation can be fun after several tries.

ProtagTime: o.o

ScienceDude: Ok. Who, what and why? You look like you've seen a ghost.

ProtagTime: _I was here ten seconds ago_ , _**then** **in** **Alola** **two** **seconds** **ago**_.

IBeASadBean: WHAT THE FUCK?!

MegaSweetheart: Did someone spike my coffee, what just happened?!

WorldChamp38: Oh yay, you noticed. :D

Jirachi: _**KATT. WHAT DID YOU DO?**_

WorldChamp38: Oh, decided to show one of my many hidden powers, being teleporting. Ash is the perfect test subject, it shuts him up for a few seconds. Or minutes. Or hours.

ScienceDude: The poor man's traumatised!

ProtagTime: o.o

Legend4Life: Omfg.

KingOfTheKeys: _Ugh...I don't feel good..._

FloraNFauna: Oh no, I smell whiskey.

SoftBoyUwU: You're drunk?! What about Faya and August, who's looking after them?!

KingOfTheKeys: _I should've called someone before I started drinking._

MarriedGoth: You're a fucking idiot.

KingOfTheKeys: Ehh...

UltimateDad: You're not the only one who's drunk. Melony's out for the count here.

LoverBoulder: YOU'RE JOKING.

ColdAsIce: Not joking. Passed out right next to me.

UltimateDad: We should get her to a bed at least.

ColdAsIce: OH ARCEUS, SHE'S HEAVY!

LoverBoulder: _**> :(**_

MarriedGoth: _**> :(**_

ColdAsIce: What?! I'm being honest! Besides, I haven't got much muscle compared to Kabu!

UltimateDad: He knows all too well. -///-

SoftBoyUwU: Drunk dad situation sorted. Since I co parent August, it's only right I look after Faya as well.

ScienceDude: You're a lifesaver, Sawyer. Ilysm.

ProtagTime: Same here.

WorldChamp38: Shit.

ProtagTime: Thanks for the potential PTSD. That was WEIRD.

WorldChamp38: You get used to it. Here, I'll prove it.

ScienceDude: WHERE DID HE GO?!

MegaSweetheart: O.o

BurnMeAlive: WTF?!

Snekki: BAD TIMING!

LostBoi: Oh, hey---and he's gone.

Sticks&Stone: HOLY FUCK!

Legend4Life: _THIS IS AWKWARD._

ChaoticGay: HAHA! GOT---nothing.

ProtagTime: ...oh wow, you do get used to it! I feel like a GOD!

WorldChamp38: Thank me later.

Legend4Life: _A S H. Please tell me you didn't see anything._

ProtagTime: Uhh...

WorldChamp38: Oh shit, I was not meant to teleport him there.

Legend4Life: **_K A T T !_**

WorldChamp38: OK, BYE!

Jirachi: Where did she go?!

PrinceLife: WHY IS KATT IN THE VILLA?!

ProtagTime: Now we know.


	49. SAVE ME!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash took Masterette is teleporting, Katt's attempting to bake..doesn't end well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feels quite nice to be in the driver's seat of this story again!

Jirachi: I don't feel good...

SoftBoyUwU: I'm running on three hours of sleep. Wut is ur point? 

ProtagTime: I decided to share the joy of teleportation with Masterette! 

WorldChamp38: I just spit out my coffee. WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU DO THAT!? 

ProtagTime: Idk. Boredom? 

Antibeast: Ash. You need to become less chaotic. 

Jirachi: Help! I was just in Sinnoh, Kalos, Unova, and Galar in the past 21 seconds! 

WorldChamp38: Welp I'm gonna attempt to make chocolate cake. 

Sciencedude: I want chocolate! 

FloraNFauna: I would like to help, so I'll be on my way over shortly! 

StabbyStabby: I retook my test. And got a 99.999999999999999999999999999

Jirachi: Congrats. I'm riding on what may be my death bed if Ash doesn't KNOCK IT OFF! 

ProtagTime: Uh-oh. 

Smolbean.but.mean: What is uh oh? 

ProtagTime: We're stuck. 

WorldChamp38: Stuck where? 

Jirachi: WE'RE IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE. AND IT'S NOT THE BEYBLADE ONE. 

WorldChamp38: **then what world R U in?**

ProtagTime: Well, one where we're running for our lives bc THE PEOPLE HERE ARE CANNIBALS! THEY WANT MY BRAIN! 

Jirachi: Not like it was helping you in your head anyways. 

FloraNFauna: I think Katt forgot about the cooldown. 

WorldChamp38: Ah yes. The cooldown in witch case it takes you 6 minutes to be able to travel to another universe, or in this case ours. 

Jirachi: Ash, I would skin you alive, but I think these people would like to do that for me! 

ProtagTime: What are we gonna do?! I don't wanna die!! 

WorldChamp38: Welp the cake we made is in the oven. BUT THIS IS CLEARLY AN ISSUE. 

Jirachi: Well, we're currently scaling the rocks, and these people have scary catch phrases, and they are clearly hungry. 

Sciencedude: Throw salt at them! 

ProtagTime: Why? 

Sciencedude: It'll distract them until you guys can come back here. 

Jirachi: Wouldn't giving Ash to them make my life easier? 

ProtagTime: I AM NOT A MEAL OPTION >:( 

WorldChamp38: the cooldown should be enuff, try teleporting back here! 

Sciencedude: Found them! They're here safe and sound. And currently asleep with Masterette laying atop of Ash. 

WorldChamp38: Welp the cake in the oven multipled, so now we have about 10 dozen cakes! 

FloraNFauna: I can only imagine Masterette and Ash's reactions once they wake up. 


	50. Kids and Tequila

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's block. Tis is just.. random asf x'D

LochNessaMonster: Okay which one of you did it? 

ProtagTime: Did what? 

ChoccyMilk: Allister's urm.. He was kinda drunk? Bea saw him passed out with tiny glasses, salt and lemon slices. 

DandelionDragon: Not just him omfa. Hoppy, Marnie and Bede are drunk too. 

GeniusSmort: Wait Bede?! Was he drinking??

MarriedGoth: .... I just need to talk. Who. 

ProtagTime: Don't look at me! 

PasioPrince: Ash you alcoholic prick. You must have influenced them! 

15YearsWasted: Wait lemon slices. Did they do tequila? 

LochNessaMonster: What else. Oh god Bea's so mad she's out for blood.. 

IBeASadBean: Wait a minute. Mairin how did you know what tequila is? 

15YearsWasted: Um.. Well... My case has nothing to do with the Galar kiddoes but.. 

ProtagTime: ... Imma head out. 

IBeASadBean: xjzjsskaiakzjajajaj ASH 


	51. The Chat Itself Is Drunk At This Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, we've had so much alcohol, we can run a business.

Bea193: _**WHO MADE ALLISTER AN ALCOHOLIC?!?!?!**_

PrinceLife: _My poor little girl..._

Bea193: WTF LEAR?!

PrinceLife: Not you. Leah somehow took two shots of vodka and is in the hospital...

ImSmort: Oh my goodness! I hope she'll be ok...

DoctorOrders: She's in good hands, she'll be alright in a few hours.

FlareBoss: Thank you so much Ben.

DoctorOrders: No need to thank me, it's my job.

ProtagTime: Oh no...

WorldChamp38: That didn't sound good and it never is, what's up?

ProtagTime: My tequila recipe is gone! It must've been taken!

SassyLostChild: I know where it is. I might be slightly hung over, but I didn't have as much as Hop and Marnie. I remember very clearly.

ImSmort: Thank goodness.

PrinceLife: Spill the tea.

SassyLostChild: We were heading to a dojo for some training. When we walk in, we see Norman as we were expecting. He taught us everything he wanted to in that lesson. We were discussing our futures during the training and alcohol came up at the end. Norman decided to teach us one more thing, which was how to make tequila. He showed us, handed us the recipe and we all practiced. Then, we made it at our homes, where we were discovered. Allister might have gotten too into the tequila making.

JustANormalGuy: You called?

Bea193: _**NORMAN!!!!!!!!!!**_

JustANormalGuy: _Uh oh._

MarriedGoth: _**YOU GOT MY SISTER DRUNK!**_

LostBoi: _**HOP'S BEEN TRIPPING EVERYWHERE!**_

WorldChamp38: Ffs, even Glenn and Nia are tipsy over in Ferrum!

BlossomBoi: At least we're sober.

ProtagTime: HOW DID _YOU_ GET HERE?!?!

BlossomBoi: I've been here since the chat was set up, I've just never been bothered to come on. -_-

Jirachi: CHRIST!

FloraNFauna: **HOLY SHIT, GET THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER!!!**

KingOfTheKeys: **FIRE!!!**

WorldChamp38: WHERE?!

KingOfTheKeys: **YOUR BASEMENT!**

ChaoticGay: Sorted. Wait, Pierre, why are you in our house?

KingOfTheKeys: Oh, helping Masterette keep her room clean, it's horrendous in there.

Legend4Life: Surely it's not THAT bad!

Jirachi: _No no, he's got a point._

ProtagTime: I feel like we can run a shop with all of the alcohol we have consumed.

WorldChamp38: True. Very true.


	52. What Just Happened!??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash somehow got mega drunk AGAIN, stole a plane, and impersonated Masterette and Katt. And they're not happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go again. Btw, partially this idea came from TheAwesomeBolt via comment, so thanks!

ProtagTime: WEEEE!!!

WorldChamp38: me and Masterette oughta skin u one of these days Ash. 

ProtagTime: Wha-why!? 

Masterette: gee...YOU STOLE A DAMN PLANE, SOMEHOW GOT DRUNK YET AGAIN.. IMPERSONATED US...YOU DON'T REMEMBER!? 

ProtagTime: No...other than I took Bonnie with me. 

Smolbean.but.mean: Welp I sure remember. I got to go skydiving. Without a parachute. 

FloraNFauna: ASHTON WILLIAM KETCHUM. YOU'RE A DANGER TO YOURSELF AND OTHERS. 

Antibeast: His middle name is William? 

ScienceDude: Not the point! My sister was almost killed bc Ash threw her out of a PLANE

Masterette: Then you dressed yourself up as Katt and I, witch I still don't understand how you did that. But that's besides the point. 

Bowtieman: AND THEN YOU CRASHED THE PLANE INTO MY KITCHEN! IN THE MIDDLE OF MY ZOOM COOKING CLASS!! 

ProtagTime: Welp I'm starting to see the problem here.... 

TotallyNOTTierno: Well you've royally screwed up this time! What are you showing everyone else! 

SoftBoyUwU: Ash is lucky we love him. Otherwise we may have KICKED him by now. 

ScienceDude: Who gave Ash alcohol this time? 

KingOfTheKeys: Welp I wish I knew. All I know is that Masterette owns a lot of various crap in her room. That somehow I ended up cleaning for her? 

Masterette: Thank you, Thank you. Idk how exactly you ended up cleaning either but ANYWAYS, ASH. You SAID YOU WERE ME ON TICTOK. AND I'M NOT EVEN ON TICTOK, AS IN I DON'T HAVE AN ACCOUNT. 

ProtagTime: Woops.. 

WorldChamp38: Brb

Sciencedude: Katt, what are you-? 

WorldChamp38: ASH. ATE. EVERY. SWEET. IN. OUR. HOUSE. 

FloraNFauna: Lemme at him! 

Protagtime: Flora..put down that flaming chainsaw, plz. 

Antibeast: YOU STOLE MY MOTHER'S PLANE OF ALL PLANES?! 

Masterette: Flora, chop him into little pieces! He ate my cotton candy! 

WorldChamp38: Woah woah woah. Relax. I have a better idea >:) 

ProtagTime: No oh Arceus anything but that! 

ScienceDude: What exactly did you just do to him? 

WorldChamp38: Locked him in shackles in our basement. I'll let him out in an hour. 

Masterette: that concludes the 52nd act! 


	53. When Life Gives you Lemons... Eat Clemont

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm noooot dead xD just mental block

ProtagTime: I'm thirsty

Antibeast: Ash you're always thirsty wdym

FloraNFauna: Nopenope. Don't you dare

ProtagTime: I'm not thirsty for that

ProtagTime: I smell lemons 

Legend4Life: Wth is that supposed to mean

SoftBoiUwU: Ash is just craving for lemonade after we passed by Bonnie making her own stand. Couldn't get a glass immediately cause she's still squeezing the lems.

smolbean.but.mean: Yay two customers already :3 

ProtagTime: LEMOOOONS 

IBeASadBean: Ash if you're that desperate for lemons go eat a clemont 

IBeASadBean: *lemon

15YearsWasted: Alain what was that?? X'DD

IBeASadBean: Mairin shhhh

ProtagTime: O_O 

SoftBoiUwU: Ash is drooling omfg 

smolbean.but.mean: Heyyy >:c 

WorldChamp38: What's this about clemont and lemons?

Legend4Life: Ash is about to commit citrus cannibalism. No wait. Idek what this is.

FloraNFauna: ... At least it's not for the stuff u.u"

ProtagTime: Lemon slices for tequila

FloraNFauna: Fuuuudge


	54. Tired Members, Drunk Talk And Now Limes?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We had lemons, now limes? Also, tired peeps and more bloody alcohol.

ScienceDude: :(

WorldChamp38: What's up?

ScienceDude: Ash just ripped some of my hair out! Luckily, there was no weird patchy bit left, but there could've been!

ProtagTime: I was trying to be gentle!

smolbean.but.mean: As if! You could've broken his brittle skull!

ScienceDude: I don't have a brittle skull!

Legend4Life: You are very sensitive to getting hit on the head. I lightly hit you with an inflated balloon once and you freaked out.

ScienceDude: Shut it Toby.

BurnMeAlive: Hey, go easy on him! He's got another heart to carry!

ScienceDude: Alright...

CasinoCentral: What have I missed?

BurnMeAlive: Not much, to be honest.

Jirachi: Quick question. There are so many people in this chat and we rarely ever see a lot of them. What's up with that?

WorldChamp38: They must be really busy. Professor Oak is one of the people in this chat and he's had a full schedule for ages. Stella's an actress, so of course, she's busy. Ace has a child to look after, so he's rarely on nowadays and we see Ben more often, Bella is working on a project with Devon Corp and as far as I know of, Tanya and Lisa are both doing volunteer work.

CasinoCentral: Oh yeah, it's a university volunteer thing. Four students are picked to do volunteer work. Brycen's university is doing the same thing and he was chosen as well.

FilmMePlz: My day has been packed...

CasinoCentral: Speak of the devil, here he is now.

FilmMePlz: Me need nap...

CasinoCentral: ...he's asleep on me.

AdowableDwagon: What have I walked into and do you need help there?

CasinoCentral: He looks adorable when asleep, leave him be.

SoftBoyUwU: When life gives you lemons, your drunk friend asks for limes!

ScienceDude: Which one?

IBeASadBean: _Come oooooon Sawyer, gimme the limes...*hic*_

Jirachi: Uhh... @MegaSweetheart come over here.

MegaSweetheart: Who @'d me?

MegaSweetheart: What the fuck?!

SoftBoyUwU: Help! He's coming for my head!

IBeASadBean: _Come here Mr Lime, punish me for being a bad boy._ ;)

ScienceDude: Nooooooo...

ProtagTime: Help! Someone! Anyone! I've been dragged in too!

IBeASadBean: _Tease me, use me, I'm all yours Ashy...*hic*_

WorldChamp38: That's just the gay mind talking.

ProtagTime: And he's out. Thanks Professor.

MegaSweetheart: Fire extinguisher. Works like a charm! He'll be fine, Ben can fix up any injuries and get him under dialysis if he's had too much. From what the kitchen look like, he'll definitely need it. Look at all the empty brandy bottles.

FloraNFauna: How much did he have exactly???

MegaSweetheart: There's litre and a half bottles. Three of them. 75% by volume.

WorldChamp38: HE HAD 4.5 LITRES OF 75% BRANDY?!?! THAT'S NEARLY A GALLON AND THAT MUCH CAN KILL!

Jirachi: Says the woman who had 17 gallons of vodka as a challenge and only got knocked out for six hours with no other consequences!

WorldChamp38: But unlike him, I'm immortal, I can drink as much as I like. About 3 gallons equates to an hour of me being knocked out and I only go unconscious after 12. Between 6 and 12, I'm just a bit sluggish.

FloraNFauna: And less than 6?

WorldChamp38: Literally nothing happens. Just feels like I've had water.

BurnMeAlive: W o w.

ProtagTime: Will he be ok?

Legend4Life: I know Al all too well, he'll have a splitting headache for hours after he wakes up and be a bit of an ass so giving him some space is for the best.

ProtagTime: Alright...

MegaSweetheart: I need to take him to my big brother first for a check up. Can't be too careful with alcohol around.

Jirachi: We really need an alcohol ban in this chat.


	55. Who's In the refridgerattor?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It isn't my fault, so don't blame me!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I. Have. No.words.

ProtagTime: Someone help me! 

Jirachi: What happened? 

ProtagTime: Clemont..for revenge...locked me in this indutrial sized refrigerator, and it's 32 degrees farenheight, and I'm only in shorts and a tee shirt!

Smolbean.but.mean: Heh. We're gonna freeze ya to death and have a fresh corpse.....

WorldChamp38: Say what now? 

ScienceDude: We have a problem..

Jirachi: CLEMONT!! GET US OUTTA HERE!!! 

FloraNFauna: What happened? 

ScienceDude: So..Masterette went in the fridge to get Ash..and the door locked behind her..and I don't know the code...and the fridge is getting colder by the minute

ProtagTime: She at least is wearing a jacket, leggings and fuzzy boots! I'm gonna be a human popsicle soon from hypothermia!! 

Jirachi: he's hugging me for dear life. Plz get me outta here. 

ScienceDude: I'm trying everything. 

Jirachi: 3..2..1..GO SHOOT! 

WorldChamp38: What did she just do? 

ProtagTime: Used herself as a human battering ram to hit the door and bust us out!! And it was successful!!! 

Jirachi: you're welcome. 

FloranFauna: Phew! Masterette could've been a human ice cube! 

ProtagTime: HEY WHAT ABOUT MOI!? 

Jirachi: We care about you Ash. But ur immortal. I'm not. 

ProtagTime: Logical point. 

SoftBoyUwU:Welp. All's fair in love and war. 

ScienceDude: umm...

Antibeast: if that's what you want to call it. 


End file.
